You rock.
12.16.2009
Dear elderly customer ...
Your extravagantly bedazzled, feathered & sequined (I am not exaggerating) sweater would have made my day today all on its own, because it was that awesome. But, when you put your items on the counter to get rung up, and told me that you'd probably be returning them soon anyways because you were sure your 10-year-old grandson was not going to like them because he "is such a pain in the a--," you DEFINITELY made my day.
You rock.
You rock.
12.13.2009
11.27.2009
Thanksgiving!
We had a lovely Thanksgiving at the Booth house - and this year, it was even free of catastrophe (although Ozzie cut it pretty close by almost biting Grandpa Booth) and crying (Okay, okay, we haven't had a family cry fight for years, but the one year it happened on Thanksgiving was kind of hilarious). Yummy food, funny people, and one smelly dog.
I love my home.
I always feel super overwhelmed when I try to list all the things that I am grateful for, because there is so much, and my words always seem inadequate. So, I'll just go with my basics. I am so grateful for my education, my freedom, my parents and superfabulous sisters, their support and love, the miracles of modern medicine, and for all the opportunities that lay ahead for me.
I am also grateful that our Thanksgivings are nothing like
this.
I love my home.
I always feel super overwhelmed when I try to list all the things that I am grateful for, because there is so much, and my words always seem inadequate. So, I'll just go with my basics. I am so grateful for my education, my freedom, my parents and superfabulous sisters, their support and love, the miracles of modern medicine, and for all the opportunities that lay ahead for me.
I am also grateful that our Thanksgivings are nothing like
this.
11.18.2009
New Moon Trailer Breakdown!
So, I have kind of avoided writing or thinking excessively about how excited I am for the New Moon release, because I am afraid of repeating what happened with Twilight: I watched every single leaked clip and trailer on the internet approximately one million times each – and it kind of spoiled certain scenes in the movie for me. (Excellent example: the ballet studio scene. Vampires are fast, strong, and they like to crash through mirrors a lot. I GOT IT.)
However, I am a fan-girl first and foremost, so I know that I will like it. Done. However, I want to go in and actually experience as much of it as I can for the first time in the theater, so that I can LOVE it.
Now that the release is so close, (I am going to the midnight showing tomorrow!) I feel much more comfortable going nutzo with geekish hope.
I now give you: Tami’s New Moon Trailer Breakdown!
My First Impressions:
Oh snap! It pretty much liquefied my brain from its huge amounts of awesome. It looks like a real movie. Twilight had an indie/I-shot-this-in-my-backyard-with-a-camcorder kind of feel, and that was fine, but I wanted it to be a little grander in scale. This trailer had the least amount of items on my “Things I laughed at” list than any other from the franchise so far. Yay team!
Things I laughed at:
1) The weird way Bella annunciates her line at the 1:27 mark. “Oy have to gooe.”
Things I loved (and-possibly-made-me-tear-up-a-little-bit-don’t-judge-meeeee):
1) The pretty music.
2) The drowning scene – it is better than how I pictured it in the book. It is so stunningly sad - she is reaching out for death when Jake pulls her out. Quite the metaphor! And the way her hand turns ghosty-Edward into pretty mist? Sob.
3) Oh crap. Victoria is so stinking scary, being all silent and sneaky behind Police Chief Swan in the woods.
4) The werewolves look amazing. Precisely as they should – like enormous, horse-sized wolves. Not fluffy cartoon lassies.
5) Crazy old Bella. Always punchin’ werewolves in the face.
6) The Volturi. Being all ancient and eeeevil. Perfect.
7) Edward’s little foot stepping into the sun. WOW.
8) Dakota fanning as Jane: I could have done with a little less eyeliner. But she does creepy and sadistic surprisingly well. (Sidenote: I have been pronouncing ‘Volturi’ wrong since 2005... Embarrassing.)
9) The awesome attention to detail. Alice’s Porsche is the right color. It’s a minor thing, but it made me happy.
And just for fun, here are some werewolves. Cartoon Wolf McGillicutty is no more!
However, I am a fan-girl first and foremost, so I know that I will like it. Done. However, I want to go in and actually experience as much of it as I can for the first time in the theater, so that I can LOVE it.
Now that the release is so close, (I am going to the midnight showing tomorrow!) I feel much more comfortable going nutzo with geekish hope.
I now give you: Tami’s New Moon Trailer Breakdown!
My First Impressions:
Oh snap! It pretty much liquefied my brain from its huge amounts of awesome. It looks like a real movie. Twilight had an indie/I-shot-this-in-my-backyard-with-a-camcorder kind of feel, and that was fine, but I wanted it to be a little grander in scale. This trailer had the least amount of items on my “Things I laughed at” list than any other from the franchise so far. Yay team!
Things I laughed at:
1) The weird way Bella annunciates her line at the 1:27 mark. “Oy have to gooe.”
Things I loved (and-possibly-made-me-tear-up-a-little-bit-don’t-judge-meeeee):
1) The pretty music.
2) The drowning scene – it is better than how I pictured it in the book. It is so stunningly sad - she is reaching out for death when Jake pulls her out. Quite the metaphor! And the way her hand turns ghosty-Edward into pretty mist? Sob.
3) Oh crap. Victoria is so stinking scary, being all silent and sneaky behind Police Chief Swan in the woods.
4) The werewolves look amazing. Precisely as they should – like enormous, horse-sized wolves. Not fluffy cartoon lassies.
5) Crazy old Bella. Always punchin’ werewolves in the face.
6) The Volturi. Being all ancient and eeeevil. Perfect.
7) Edward’s little foot stepping into the sun. WOW.
8) Dakota fanning as Jane: I could have done with a little less eyeliner. But she does creepy and sadistic surprisingly well. (Sidenote: I have been pronouncing ‘Volturi’ wrong since 2005... Embarrassing.)
9) The awesome attention to detail. Alice’s Porsche is the right color. It’s a minor thing, but it made me happy.
And just for fun, here are some werewolves. Cartoon Wolf McGillicutty is no more!
11.04.2009
I Have Experienced The Laser Beam of Death
Actually, it was just the laser beam of... dermatology. But it still hurt like the dickens.
So, I went into my dermatologist's office yesterday. I was feeling cool, calm, collected, even as they handed me the scary metal goggles that looked like something you would wear if you enjoyed tanning in a radioactive sunbed. Laser? Shmaser.
But. THEN. She started zapping my face, and it felt like a cross between being snapped with rubber bands and being poked with tiny, tiny needles. At the same time. I felt like a baby because I kept like, wincing and saying, "Oh!" (It was startling! Every single time!) When I told her that, though, she said that I actually did well - some people cry. So I felt a little less like a baby.
I don't know what the moral of this story is. I just wanted to whine.
In other news, I'm almost 24! Yeeeee hawwwww.
So, I went into my dermatologist's office yesterday. I was feeling cool, calm, collected, even as they handed me the scary metal goggles that looked like something you would wear if you enjoyed tanning in a radioactive sunbed. Laser? Shmaser.
But. THEN. She started zapping my face, and it felt like a cross between being snapped with rubber bands and being poked with tiny, tiny needles. At the same time. I felt like a baby because I kept like, wincing and saying, "Oh!" (It was startling! Every single time!) When I told her that, though, she said that I actually did well - some people cry. So I felt a little less like a baby.
I don't know what the moral of this story is. I just wanted to whine.
In other news, I'm almost 24! Yeeeee hawwwww.
10.19.2009
October 19th (aka I hate thinking of titles for my posts)
Life is good.
I cried today. Not a lot, just a little. It felt good. I was remembering how six years ago, I made a phone call, and the info I got - that Ryan had died - changed me. It was a Sunday morning.
I remember hanging up the phone. The specifics I remember about that morning are so strange and disjointed. After I returned the phone to the cradle, I was struck by how contradictory it was for the sun to be shining brightly. It felt wrong that it was nice and warm, streaming through the window onto my crumpled face. Nothing should be allowed to be so beautiful and soothing when I felt like sinking straight through my bed and into the center of the earth.
Next, I remember being upstairs in my parents room. I told them. For some reason I felt the need to tell each of my sisters individually, as well. I remember sitting on the floor of some one's closet for a few minutes, for no reason.
The next really vivid memory was later in the day, right before dusk. I was sitting on the back porch swing, and was amazed that I could feel so much pain in every single way. Each breath felt like I was heaving a huge weight up and down on my chest. Even more bewildering was the knowlege that his family & his life-long friends must have been feeling much, much worse than I was. It didn't seem possible that any single body could hold that much hurt. That was the first time in my life that absolutely nothing made sense, and absolutely nothing could make me feel better. I could close my eyes, but he was still dead. I tried to lay down and sleep, but he was still gone. I couldn't find rest or peace in anything for those first days.
The last memory of that week was at his viewing. I walked by his casket, and I was gripped by the desire to touch his hand one last time but I couldn't, because I knew his body would be cold and that it would be just enough to push me over the edge. Since I didn't want to cause a scene by curling up in the fetal position on the mortuary floor, I walked past him and resisted with my hands grasped tightly together.
I hate sounding dramatic, but - it changed my life. And the most amazing part is that going through pain like that doesn't ruin you forever, like I thought it must; oddly, it makes every single happy moment richer. It stretched me, and now my capacity to love and live and experience joy is even bigger than before. Weird, right?
In other news, I love my job. The hours are perfect, its just challenging enough to be fun, but not overwhelming. The only (small, but occasionally entertaining) down side is having to walk past those shameless sales people who man those carts in the middle of the hallways and try to get your attention by any means possible. Oy.
Today I was walking by, and this dude with an accent and too much gel in his hair was holding a lotion sample out to me, smiling creepily.
Him: "Can I talk to you for a minute?"
Me: [Polite smile, with eye contact] "No, thank you."
Him: "But can I just ask you one little question?" [shoves the nasty little cup of lotion in front of my face. I can practically see the swine flu virus swimming around in it.]
Me: "No." [I now realize the eye contact was a big mistake. I avert my gaze and start to walk away.]
Him, shouting now, from a distance: "BUT I REALLY LIKE YOUR HAIR!"
[Did he seriously just say that? Yes. Yes he did. I laughed, but didn't turn around. Boo-yah.]
I cried today. Not a lot, just a little. It felt good. I was remembering how six years ago, I made a phone call, and the info I got - that Ryan had died - changed me. It was a Sunday morning.
I remember hanging up the phone. The specifics I remember about that morning are so strange and disjointed. After I returned the phone to the cradle, I was struck by how contradictory it was for the sun to be shining brightly. It felt wrong that it was nice and warm, streaming through the window onto my crumpled face. Nothing should be allowed to be so beautiful and soothing when I felt like sinking straight through my bed and into the center of the earth.
Next, I remember being upstairs in my parents room. I told them. For some reason I felt the need to tell each of my sisters individually, as well. I remember sitting on the floor of some one's closet for a few minutes, for no reason.
The next really vivid memory was later in the day, right before dusk. I was sitting on the back porch swing, and was amazed that I could feel so much pain in every single way. Each breath felt like I was heaving a huge weight up and down on my chest. Even more bewildering was the knowlege that his family & his life-long friends must have been feeling much, much worse than I was. It didn't seem possible that any single body could hold that much hurt. That was the first time in my life that absolutely nothing made sense, and absolutely nothing could make me feel better. I could close my eyes, but he was still dead. I tried to lay down and sleep, but he was still gone. I couldn't find rest or peace in anything for those first days.
The last memory of that week was at his viewing. I walked by his casket, and I was gripped by the desire to touch his hand one last time but I couldn't, because I knew his body would be cold and that it would be just enough to push me over the edge. Since I didn't want to cause a scene by curling up in the fetal position on the mortuary floor, I walked past him and resisted with my hands grasped tightly together.
I hate sounding dramatic, but - it changed my life. And the most amazing part is that going through pain like that doesn't ruin you forever, like I thought it must; oddly, it makes every single happy moment richer. It stretched me, and now my capacity to love and live and experience joy is even bigger than before. Weird, right?
In other news, I love my job. The hours are perfect, its just challenging enough to be fun, but not overwhelming. The only (small, but occasionally entertaining) down side is having to walk past those shameless sales people who man those carts in the middle of the hallways and try to get your attention by any means possible. Oy.
Today I was walking by, and this dude with an accent and too much gel in his hair was holding a lotion sample out to me, smiling creepily.
Him: "Can I talk to you for a minute?"
Me: [Polite smile, with eye contact] "No, thank you."
Him: "But can I just ask you one little question?" [shoves the nasty little cup of lotion in front of my face. I can practically see the swine flu virus swimming around in it.]
Me: "No." [I now realize the eye contact was a big mistake. I avert my gaze and start to walk away.]
Him, shouting now, from a distance: "BUT I REALLY LIKE YOUR HAIR!"
[Did he seriously just say that? Yes. Yes he did. I laughed, but didn't turn around. Boo-yah.]
9.02.2009
Pretzel bites are not worth dying for.
Today, I almost had a near death experience.
I was walking through the food court at the mall on my way to work, and thought that I'd get some yummy pretzel bites from 'pretzel maker' to go with my obligatory dr. pepper. Caught up in the moment, I forgot how inconvenient it would be to hold my bites (which come in a cup) as well as my drink while I tried to get on the escalator. I stepped onto the moving stair with one foot - and for one very, very long moment, I lost my balance and my stomach did a flip-flop. I had no hands free to hold onto the handrail. My escalator-foot was moving farther and farther away from the foot that was planted firmly on the 2nd floor. I honestly thought I was either going to:
1)fall down the escalator,
2) spill my pretzel bites and my drink all over myself, or
3)both.
I pondered in that moment what an undignified death that would be. Taking a tumble down the escalator, landing right in front of my work's front door soaked in dr. pepper and covered in pretzel bites is NOT really how I'd like to go.
Even though pretzel bites ARE delicious.
I was walking through the food court at the mall on my way to work, and thought that I'd get some yummy pretzel bites from 'pretzel maker' to go with my obligatory dr. pepper. Caught up in the moment, I forgot how inconvenient it would be to hold my bites (which come in a cup) as well as my drink while I tried to get on the escalator. I stepped onto the moving stair with one foot - and for one very, very long moment, I lost my balance and my stomach did a flip-flop. I had no hands free to hold onto the handrail. My escalator-foot was moving farther and farther away from the foot that was planted firmly on the 2nd floor. I honestly thought I was either going to:
1)fall down the escalator,
2) spill my pretzel bites and my drink all over myself, or
3)both.
I pondered in that moment what an undignified death that would be. Taking a tumble down the escalator, landing right in front of my work's front door soaked in dr. pepper and covered in pretzel bites is NOT really how I'd like to go.
Even though pretzel bites ARE delicious.
8.17.2009
I don't care that half my posts are about Twilight.
Oh, snap.
Looks like they are sticking with Cartoon-Wolf McGillicutty, but I'll deal with it. Because it looks freaking awesome. Oh, also because - Jacob's kind of a hottie. Is that gross of me? He's 17.
Oh, well.
Looks like they are sticking with Cartoon-Wolf McGillicutty, but I'll deal with it. Because it looks freaking awesome. Oh, also because - Jacob's kind of a hottie. Is that gross of me? He's 17.
Oh, well.
8.16.2009
'Cause he's BAD.
(This was said after our lovely dog, Ozzie, snuck upstairs and started eating starbursts from the bag...)
Mom: "We really should make a video of all of the bad things Ozzie does. We could play that Michael Jackson song in the background, and have him wear a little hat. Get it? 'Cause he's BAD."
Mom: "We really should make a video of all of the bad things Ozzie does. We could play that Michael Jackson song in the background, and have him wear a little hat. Get it? 'Cause he's BAD."
7.21.2009
I should be doing my paper...
...NOT looking at the archives of SexyPeopleBlog. (PS thanks for the link, Kris.)
Anywho. Since I'm on the interwebs already, I thought I'd let it be known that, one day, when I have a boyfriend, I'd like him to never get me flowers. I'd prefer books instead.
My friend got books today from an admiring boy, and I thought that was WAY more romantic than receiving a bunch of bug-filled carnations from wal-mart, any day of the week.
That is all.
Anywho. Since I'm on the interwebs already, I thought I'd let it be known that, one day, when I have a boyfriend, I'd like him to never get me flowers. I'd prefer books instead.
My friend got books today from an admiring boy, and I thought that was WAY more romantic than receiving a bunch of bug-filled carnations from wal-mart, any day of the week.
That is all.
7.18.2009
Crass, crass inspiration
Hello fwends.
Finals week is here, so no real blogging. However, This post from one of my new most favorite bloggers ever made me laugh, and think, and remember. Please note - I would rate the language 'mature,' or 'cuss-tastic,' so you have been warned.
My favorite snippet:
"If they ask me to hold hands and say the serenity prayer, I will drive this crayola through my brain."
Finals week is here, so no real blogging. However, This post from one of my new most favorite bloggers ever made me laugh, and think, and remember. Please note - I would rate the language 'mature,' or 'cuss-tastic,' so you have been warned.
My favorite snippet:
"If they ask me to hold hands and say the serenity prayer, I will drive this crayola through my brain."
7.15.2009
Arry Pottah!
It was amazing. I just.... I just can't describe it.
Ok, actually, maybe I will try to, but later.
K Thanks!
Ok, actually, maybe I will try to, but later.
K Thanks!
7.14.2009
Insight from my Children's Lit class
"Generally when speaking with adolescents, if you state that Mary is pretty and Jane is smart, all they will hear is that Mary is stupid and Jane is ugly."
Ha haaaaa.
Ha haaaaa.
7.05.2009
Dearest Co-Worker,
You made me feel so smugly wise for bringing earplugs for my non-headsetted ear this week.
I am not sure why you thought it was appropriate to sing "Everybody wants to be a cat" from 'The Aristocats' at the top of your shaky singing voice over and OVER at work, especially when you work at a call center, where people generally like to understand what their customers are saying over the phone.
Anywho, good luck with your singing career.
Sincerely,
Tami
I am not sure why you thought it was appropriate to sing "Everybody wants to be a cat" from 'The Aristocats' at the top of your shaky singing voice over and OVER at work, especially when you work at a call center, where people generally like to understand what their customers are saying over the phone.
Anywho, good luck with your singing career.
Sincerely,
Tami
7.03.2009
Dear 'Hostess 100-Calorie Packs'....
You rock my world. I cannot believe you are only 100 delicious calories.
Sincerely,
Tami
7.02.2009
Street-Wise Roller Skating Babies.
I know I haven't posted a real blog in a long time. Homework has been crazy.
This isn't a real blog, but it will make you happy. The End.
This isn't a real blog, but it will make you happy. The End.
5.31.2009
Oh my asdlfkajsdlfahd;iasdfhdajfhalksdf (geek seizure)
THE TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON trailer in HD
Things I laughed at...lovingly:
1) How the Jacob-werewolf is a CARTOON. I'm hoping that is just a rough draft of the CGI wolves.BLA.
2) Jasper's hair. I didn't think it could have gotten worse. It has.
3) Laurent's theatrical "I'm gonna suck youah blooood" hand gesture. Yea.
Things I LOVED-
1) How perfect the makeup and contacts are this time around.
2) How they somehow transported every visual detail directly from my imagination into the scenery. In Twilight, I kept getting distracted by how different everything looked than how I had imagined it; I think New Moon is going to blow my mind, detail-wise.
3) When he leaves her. SOBBBBB.
4) How freakin' scary Laurent looks!
5) The transformation!!
6) Cinematic value. It just looks so much cooler! Probably the result of a higher budget.
Excuse me while I go make a black, white, and red paper chain to help me count down the days till November.
Things I laughed at...lovingly:
1) How the Jacob-werewolf is a CARTOON. I'm hoping that is just a rough draft of the CGI wolves.BLA.
2) Jasper's hair. I didn't think it could have gotten worse. It has.
3) Laurent's theatrical "I'm gonna suck youah blooood" hand gesture. Yea.
Things I LOVED-
1) How perfect the makeup and contacts are this time around.
2) How they somehow transported every visual detail directly from my imagination into the scenery. In Twilight, I kept getting distracted by how different everything looked than how I had imagined it; I think New Moon is going to blow my mind, detail-wise.
3) When he leaves her. SOBBBBB.
4) How freakin' scary Laurent looks!
5) The transformation!!
6) Cinematic value. It just looks so much cooler! Probably the result of a higher budget.
Excuse me while I go make a black, white, and red paper chain to help me count down the days till November.
5.06.2009
Fun times at work...
(this was during a phone survey, and we had to get the location of the caller.)
ME: "Okay, and what county do you live in?"
CALLER: "Um, its... uh... I...."
ME: "Is it H------------- County, or some other county?"
CALLER: "I ... Just... (whispering) I have no idea."
*hangs up*
ME: "Okay, and what county do you live in?"
CALLER: "Um, its... uh... I...."
ME: "Is it H------------- County, or some other county?"
CALLER: "I ... Just... (whispering) I have no idea."
*hangs up*
4.24.2009
I wish I could pass it off as a night terror...
... because I have had those before.
I had this one where there was a giant spider sitting on my chest, and it was staring at me. All I could do was stare back. If that doesn't sound scary, I guess you had to be there. I had another one after watching "The Bunny Lady" video on youtube. In that one, the leading lady was sitting in my desk chair, also looking at me. I dare you not to have a night terror as well after watching that. I guess my subconscious is trying to tell me that my greatest fear is being looked at. Or maybe I just really don't enjoy eye contact. Who knows.
Enough about my psyche. Switching gears!
I wish I could pass off what happened last night as a night terror because I feel like a total doofus for screaming bloody murder at two in the morning and running the possibly making my roommates fear for my life. What happened was this:
Something rustled in my room. And it wasn't a normal, 'room-rustling' sound. It for sure wasn't the pipes, the heater vent, or the sound of the wind. When I heard it, I immediately thought of the hyper-aggressive little squirrel-fiends that run around my apartment complex in the summertime. Those things are brazen little monsters, and have run into my apartment before, baring their nasty little teeth. They fear nothing.
So, since it was late and dark, I imagined that the sound I heard was exactly like what a squirrel would sound like, if it were rifling through my garbage can. Then, about ten seconds later, something lightweight landed on my leg. I screamed like a banshee, wildly flinging my leg up - trying to send whatever had landed on me airborne.
I switched on my bedside lamp, and noticed two things simultaneously: That the small garbage can next to my desk was full of oddly stacked papers which were slowly settling, explaining the rustling noise I had heard. The next thing I noticed was that a corner of my bedspread had somehow gotten yanked up while I was tossing and turning in the night, and had chosen, ten seconds previous, to settle back down - right on my leg.
I thought about checking to see if I had woken my roommates up, but they weren't making any noise. After checking with them this morning, I found out that my scream hadn't woken anyone up. Whew!
Also: If you clicked on the link to that bunny lady video, I apologize for ruining your life. Toodles.
night terror n.- A state of intense fear and agitation sometimes experienced, especially by children, on awakening from a stage of sleep not associated with dreaming but characterized by extremely vivid hallucinations
I had this one where there was a giant spider sitting on my chest, and it was staring at me. All I could do was stare back. If that doesn't sound scary, I guess you had to be there. I had another one after watching "The Bunny Lady" video on youtube. In that one, the leading lady was sitting in my desk chair, also looking at me. I dare you not to have a night terror as well after watching that. I guess my subconscious is trying to tell me that my greatest fear is being looked at. Or maybe I just really don't enjoy eye contact. Who knows.
Enough about my psyche. Switching gears!
I wish I could pass off what happened last night as a night terror because I feel like a total doofus for screaming bloody murder at two in the morning and running the possibly making my roommates fear for my life. What happened was this:
Something rustled in my room. And it wasn't a normal, 'room-rustling' sound. It for sure wasn't the pipes, the heater vent, or the sound of the wind. When I heard it, I immediately thought of the hyper-aggressive little squirrel-fiends that run around my apartment complex in the summertime. Those things are brazen little monsters, and have run into my apartment before, baring their nasty little teeth. They fear nothing.
So, since it was late and dark, I imagined that the sound I heard was exactly like what a squirrel would sound like, if it were rifling through my garbage can. Then, about ten seconds later, something lightweight landed on my leg. I screamed like a banshee, wildly flinging my leg up - trying to send whatever had landed on me airborne.
I switched on my bedside lamp, and noticed two things simultaneously: That the small garbage can next to my desk was full of oddly stacked papers which were slowly settling, explaining the rustling noise I had heard. The next thing I noticed was that a corner of my bedspread had somehow gotten yanked up while I was tossing and turning in the night, and had chosen, ten seconds previous, to settle back down - right on my leg.
I thought about checking to see if I had woken my roommates up, but they weren't making any noise. After checking with them this morning, I found out that my scream hadn't woken anyone up. Whew!
Also: If you clicked on the link to that bunny lady video, I apologize for ruining your life. Toodles.
4.21.2009
Tidbits from home...
I am super-behind on blogging. I know. But, I wanted to post a few memorable quotes from my visit home, before I forget them. Beguuuuuuzzz, I find my family quite hilarious and I don't want to forget these.
Kristin: "I wish everyone would stop acting like Miley Cyrus doesn't have a major speech impediment! Seriously, she does."
(This next conversation happened after watching Twilight with us - Go Dad!)
Daughter: "Dad, why are you so freaking hairy?"
Dad: "I belong to a native american tribe of werewolves...what are they called? Quileutes. I'm a Quileute."
Kristin: "I wish everyone would stop acting like Miley Cyrus doesn't have a major speech impediment! Seriously, she does."
(This next conversation happened after watching Twilight with us - Go Dad!)
Daughter: "Dad, why are you so freaking hairy?"
Dad: "I belong to a native american tribe of werewolves...what are they called? Quileutes. I'm a Quileute."
4.02.2009
3.20.2009
I have procrastinated doing one of these ....
...even though I believe I've been 'tagged' around eleven times in the past two months. I just didn't think I could actually come up with 25 interesting facts about myself. Then I realized that that is exactly what like, Eeyore would think. One of my non-serious goals in life is to be as little like Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh as possible. Eeyore bugs the crap out of me. I should get a bracelet that says WWEND. (What Would Eeyore Not Do)...
Aaaaanyways!
1. I bought my first car when I was 17. I still have her. I named her Delilah, because I love that name, but I think it would be rude to name one of my children Delilah because the namesake is kind of a nasty biblical ho. So, I settled for giving the name to my car. Anyways, I love her so much I kind of think of her as a non-living pet. Weird.
2. I am HATE bananas. Everything about them disgusts me. To illustrate how serious I am, here is a little story. One time when I was about 8, my kid sister Nicole was following me around the house, as kid sisters often do. (It may have been Michelle, but I am pretty sure it was Nicole.) I looked over my shoulder as we were exiting the kitchen, and I noticed that she had unknowingly stepped on an oozing black banana. (oh my gosh, my palms are seriously starting to sweat while typing this.) I screamed and started sprinting for dear life to my bedroom. She noticed that something was amiss, but probably thought that a stray rabid dog had wandered into the house or something from the way I was running. So, she ran too. She started gaining on me, and I was too manic at the time to explain that SHE and the nasty banana puke on her foot were what I was running from. I tried to slam my bedroom door to keep her from following me (don't judge me); but she pushed it open, still thinking that there was something chasing her, too. I jumped on my bed to get away from her, and she jumped on it too. By that time I was screaming, and my mom came in to investigate. She lovingly burst out laughing when I tried to explain what had happened. This entire story happened over the span of about 45 seconds.
3. I have not been on a date that I was actually asked out on in about three years. (I was going to write that I hadn't been asked on a date in three years, but then I remembered that this friendly drunk guy I met at a party asked me out via text a year ago. I politely declined.) Oddly enough, it doesn't really bother me.
4. Even though I will never get one, I am fascinated by tattoos. I think they are gorgeous, and I love how they have evolved over time into their own little genre of modern art.
5. I miss being a toddler daycare teacher practically every single day. I miss my babies!
6. I have to stop myself from starting a really good book if I have things to do. I literally can't put down a really gripping read unless it is to eat, potty, or sleep.
7. I have a chicken-pox scar on my right cheek. I used to hate it when I was younger, but now I think it gives me character. I don't cover it with makeup.
8. I have never been stung by a bee.
9. I never want to be stung by a bee.
10. I have changed my major about 4 times - but I think I have it just right this time. (English major with a creative writing emphasis; minoring in graphic art and possibly history....innnnnnnn case you were wondering)
11. There is something about the Bay Area (and especially Fremont and the Pacific Ocean) that makes me nostaligic- almost to the point of tears- whenever I go back. I love the smells, the weirdos, the palm trees and the traffic. It's still home for me.
12. I think LOLcats are hilarious. Seriously.
13. My body image right now is exponentially more positive than it was when I was 15, skinny and tan. I have grown to love my whole body- lumpiness, stretchmarks, cellulite and all - because it is mine. Weird! But awesome!
14. Moving from California to Utah at the age of 15 was one of the hardest things that I have done - but it also was one of the best changes of my life. There is nothing like starting over.
15. My parents made up my first name (Tamalyn). I love it. It makes it really easy to choose email addresses and screen names. My middle name is the same as my mom's (Kay), and it rhymes with the rest of my sisters' middle names. (In case you were wondering, those middle names are: Renee, Kay, May, Linnae, and Elaine. I know, Michelle's kind of doesn't rhyme, but my mom is a busy woman.)
16. One of my favorite things about my mom is how protective she is of us. Not in the weird, helicopter-mom way where she tries to swoop in and rescue us from our own mistakes, but in a momma-grizzly-bear way when she really needs to. Case in point: She is kind of scared of big mean dogs. Which is normal. This one time, when I was about 10, she was walking one of my sisters home (I really can't remember which sister it was, because the details are a little foggy) from Glenmoore Elementary School. I believe she also had the stroller with Baby-Michelle in it. A dog was walking down the street towards them, and as it came nearer, I think it growled at her. My mom tore an election sign that was staked into a neighbors lawn that she was passing, and beat the dog with it until it ran away. She is my hero.
17. One of my favorite things about my dad is how FREAKING LEVEL HEADED he is. I have never, ever heard him yell in anger at anyone, ever. Not even my dog. Also, he is really hard to scare. Case in point: You know those mean-but-hilarious websites that have a maze that you have to follow really carefully, but then out of nowhere a picture pops up of the girl from 'The Exorcist' and the speakers blare a really scary noise, basically making you poop your pants? We tricked my dad into doing it, and his reaction to the scare-attack was.... he blinked. Once.
The End! It was supposed to be 25 things, but I have homework.
Aaaaanyways!
1. I bought my first car when I was 17. I still have her. I named her Delilah, because I love that name, but I think it would be rude to name one of my children Delilah because the namesake is kind of a nasty biblical ho. So, I settled for giving the name to my car. Anyways, I love her so much I kind of think of her as a non-living pet. Weird.
2. I am HATE bananas. Everything about them disgusts me. To illustrate how serious I am, here is a little story. One time when I was about 8, my kid sister Nicole was following me around the house, as kid sisters often do. (It may have been Michelle, but I am pretty sure it was Nicole.) I looked over my shoulder as we were exiting the kitchen, and I noticed that she had unknowingly stepped on an oozing black banana. (oh my gosh, my palms are seriously starting to sweat while typing this.) I screamed and started sprinting for dear life to my bedroom. She noticed that something was amiss, but probably thought that a stray rabid dog had wandered into the house or something from the way I was running. So, she ran too. She started gaining on me, and I was too manic at the time to explain that SHE and the nasty banana puke on her foot were what I was running from. I tried to slam my bedroom door to keep her from following me (don't judge me); but she pushed it open, still thinking that there was something chasing her, too. I jumped on my bed to get away from her, and she jumped on it too. By that time I was screaming, and my mom came in to investigate. She lovingly burst out laughing when I tried to explain what had happened. This entire story happened over the span of about 45 seconds.
3. I have not been on a date that I was actually asked out on in about three years. (I was going to write that I hadn't been asked on a date in three years, but then I remembered that this friendly drunk guy I met at a party asked me out via text a year ago. I politely declined.) Oddly enough, it doesn't really bother me.
4. Even though I will never get one, I am fascinated by tattoos. I think they are gorgeous, and I love how they have evolved over time into their own little genre of modern art.
5. I miss being a toddler daycare teacher practically every single day. I miss my babies!
6. I have to stop myself from starting a really good book if I have things to do. I literally can't put down a really gripping read unless it is to eat, potty, or sleep.
7. I have a chicken-pox scar on my right cheek. I used to hate it when I was younger, but now I think it gives me character. I don't cover it with makeup.
8. I have never been stung by a bee.
9. I never want to be stung by a bee.
10. I have changed my major about 4 times - but I think I have it just right this time. (English major with a creative writing emphasis; minoring in graphic art and possibly history....innnnnnnn case you were wondering)
11. There is something about the Bay Area (and especially Fremont and the Pacific Ocean) that makes me nostaligic- almost to the point of tears- whenever I go back. I love the smells, the weirdos, the palm trees and the traffic. It's still home for me.
12. I think LOLcats are hilarious. Seriously.
13. My body image right now is exponentially more positive than it was when I was 15, skinny and tan. I have grown to love my whole body- lumpiness, stretchmarks, cellulite and all - because it is mine. Weird! But awesome!
14. Moving from California to Utah at the age of 15 was one of the hardest things that I have done - but it also was one of the best changes of my life. There is nothing like starting over.
15. My parents made up my first name (Tamalyn). I love it. It makes it really easy to choose email addresses and screen names. My middle name is the same as my mom's (Kay), and it rhymes with the rest of my sisters' middle names. (In case you were wondering, those middle names are: Renee, Kay, May, Linnae, and Elaine. I know, Michelle's kind of doesn't rhyme, but my mom is a busy woman.)
16. One of my favorite things about my mom is how protective she is of us. Not in the weird, helicopter-mom way where she tries to swoop in and rescue us from our own mistakes, but in a momma-grizzly-bear way when she really needs to. Case in point: She is kind of scared of big mean dogs. Which is normal. This one time, when I was about 10, she was walking one of my sisters home (I really can't remember which sister it was, because the details are a little foggy) from Glenmoore Elementary School. I believe she also had the stroller with Baby-Michelle in it. A dog was walking down the street towards them, and as it came nearer, I think it growled at her. My mom tore an election sign that was staked into a neighbors lawn that she was passing, and beat the dog with it until it ran away. She is my hero.
17. One of my favorite things about my dad is how FREAKING LEVEL HEADED he is. I have never, ever heard him yell in anger at anyone, ever. Not even my dog. Also, he is really hard to scare. Case in point: You know those mean-but-hilarious websites that have a maze that you have to follow really carefully, but then out of nowhere a picture pops up of the girl from 'The Exorcist' and the speakers blare a really scary noise, basically making you poop your pants? We tricked my dad into doing it, and his reaction to the scare-attack was.... he blinked. Once.
The End! It was supposed to be 25 things, but I have homework.
3.16.2009
I know I have been slacking...
...And I am very disappointed in myself for not exactly 'blogging semi-weekly,' as promised in my New Years resolutions post. I'm not doing so hot on the other resolutions, either. My fat jeans? Yea, they're skin tight right now. Sad. I have been crazy busy with classwork, but my lack of bloggieness is mainly because I have developed this... blog-o-phobia, if you will, since I started my "Foundations Writing" course.
Since I’ve started really analyzing my writing and the things I read, I’ve been grasped by this paralyzing fear of writing something wrong (grammatically, syntax-wise, etc), which has resulted in me being afraid to write anything passionately for fear that it will be structurally lame. Which leads to very negative self-talk, such as "Oh my gosh, run on sentences, hanging clauses, BAD WRITING! I suck at life!! "
So, I’ve decided something: I’ll write as crappily and slangy as I feel like doing; however, when I go back and revise, I’ll use my newfound knowledge in the English language to edit wisely. Awesome! (high-fives-self)
In other news, I love my roomates. Looking over my last post about miss-crazy-from-greece has made me really value what good people they are - and they're great to live with, to boot! Like, we actually do our own dishes. We vacuum. We buy toilet paper. In other words, life is good. We plan on going to the No Doubt/Paramore concert in May (HOLLA!!!) and it would be an understatement to say I'm stoked about it. You'll get to meet my roomies then, too, family! (if you're in Utah at the time. Plan on it.)
Okay bye!
Since I’ve started really analyzing my writing and the things I read, I’ve been grasped by this paralyzing fear of writing something wrong (grammatically, syntax-wise, etc), which has resulted in me being afraid to write anything passionately for fear that it will be structurally lame. Which leads to very negative self-talk, such as "Oh my gosh, run on sentences, hanging clauses, BAD WRITING! I suck at life!! "
So, I’ve decided something: I’ll write as crappily and slangy as I feel like doing; however, when I go back and revise, I’ll use my newfound knowledge in the English language to edit wisely. Awesome! (high-fives-self)
In other news, I love my roomates. Looking over my last post about miss-crazy-from-greece has made me really value what good people they are - and they're great to live with, to boot! Like, we actually do our own dishes. We vacuum. We buy toilet paper. In other words, life is good. We plan on going to the No Doubt/Paramore concert in May (HOLLA!!!) and it would be an understatement to say I'm stoked about it. You'll get to meet my roomies then, too, family! (if you're in Utah at the time. Plan on it.)
Okay bye!
3.14.2009
I love this website.
SO. FUNNY.
I wish I had known about this site when I lived with my perma-angry foreign roommate. Sigh. I also wish that I had taken pictures of the notes she left so I could treasure her sweet little nothings forever.
Here's some of the notes that I remember - (of course, there were plenty more, but I can only record the ones that were funny enough to be memorable) I believe at least one of these was printed on my own personal heart shaped post-its. Oh,the irony!
DISCLAIMER: I am not making any of this up; the misspellings and the caps locks are authentic. These are correct as far as I can remember.
my knife is not in drawere. Plz BRING IT OUT!!! IT IS MINE
(she was convinced that whenever she misplaced one of her utensils, we were hiding it in our bedrooms)
This one was placed directly on the thermostat, in the dead of summer:
DO NOT turn off heater! it is FRZZNG!
I guess in her homeland of Greece, there was no air conditioner, so she didn't feel comfortable unless it was 95 degrees indoors. She could have remedied this problem at any time if she put on more clothes in the morning than silky lingerie tops and shortie shorts that showed her tush... but I digress.
Unfortunately, since the notes started happening after she had verbally forbidden us from speaking to her or her guests, instead of talking to her about it, we decided the best idea was to take the batteries out of the thermostat. Problem solved.
The next note puzzled me and Marie (my non-insane roommate), since by that time Kristina had forbidden us from speaking to her. I think it was in response to when I had asked her friend (who was living in Kristina's bedroom for about a month, using our TP, eating our food, and watching marie's TV rent-free) when exactly she planned on leaving.
If you have something say 2 my guests, DO NOT TELL THEM. SPK ONLY TO ME. THX
My favorite part was the 'thx' at the end. Oh, how I DON'T miss Ms. Crazy.
I wish I had known about this site when I lived with my perma-angry foreign roommate. Sigh. I also wish that I had taken pictures of the notes she left so I could treasure her sweet little nothings forever.
Here's some of the notes that I remember - (of course, there were plenty more, but I can only record the ones that were funny enough to be memorable) I believe at least one of these was printed on my own personal heart shaped post-its. Oh,the irony!
DISCLAIMER: I am not making any of this up; the misspellings and the caps locks are authentic. These are correct as far as I can remember.
my knife is not in drawere. Plz BRING IT OUT!!! IT IS MINE
(she was convinced that whenever she misplaced one of her utensils, we were hiding it in our bedrooms)
This one was placed directly on the thermostat, in the dead of summer:
DO NOT turn off heater! it is FRZZNG!
I guess in her homeland of Greece, there was no air conditioner, so she didn't feel comfortable unless it was 95 degrees indoors. She could have remedied this problem at any time if she put on more clothes in the morning than silky lingerie tops and shortie shorts that showed her tush... but I digress.
Unfortunately, since the notes started happening after she had verbally forbidden us from speaking to her or her guests, instead of talking to her about it, we decided the best idea was to take the batteries out of the thermostat. Problem solved.
The next note puzzled me and Marie (my non-insane roommate), since by that time Kristina had forbidden us from speaking to her. I think it was in response to when I had asked her friend (who was living in Kristina's bedroom for about a month, using our TP, eating our food, and watching marie's TV rent-free) when exactly she planned on leaving.
If you have something say 2 my guests, DO NOT TELL THEM. SPK ONLY TO ME. THX
My favorite part was the 'thx' at the end. Oh, how I DON'T miss Ms. Crazy.
2.27.2009
Technically, I don't think children should have access to webcams....
And yet if they didn't this video's absence would leave a gaping hole in my life forever.
Highlights:
1) Full slow-motion spins.
2) Toy steering wheel.
3) How he looks like a cross between the kid on Jerry Maguire and Spence from "King of Queens."
4) The fact that you can SEE his listhp when he sings.
You're welcome.
Highlights:
1) Full slow-motion spins.
2) Toy steering wheel.
3) How he looks like a cross between the kid on Jerry Maguire and Spence from "King of Queens."
4) The fact that you can SEE his listhp when he sings.
You're welcome.
1.27.2009
Bad Day Gone Good
So, I was feeling frustrated this morning (and by morning, I mean 11:45-ish) because I was running a little late for class. I was especially annoyed when I stepped outside, only to be greeted by my car completely encased in ice, with a light sprinkling of snow on top for good measure. Argh. So, I spent 15 minutes clomping around my poor little car-cicle, until my fingers were numb, my car mostly scraped, with a mere 5 minutes left until my class started.
When I pulled into the lot, I ran (okay, I guess it was more of a power-walk) into the building only to find my classroom deserted. Totally empty. I had been absent the previous class period, and apparently missed the memo that there was no class today. BOO.
I stomped back to my car, now conveniently and uselessly defrosted, drove to my apartment, and continued my frustrated stomping into my living room. I was inwardly grumbling when I put some leftover enchiladas into the microwave in an attempt to eat my crankies away. As I settled down on the couch to dig in, I saw this clip on "The Soup," and it honestly made my bad day turn good. I laughed so hard I cried, and I ALMOST had to spit out my half-chewed food. Bless Joel McHale's sarcastic and occasionally profane little heart.
Edit: Youtube wouldn't let me embed the clip from the soup, so here is some footage of the dog it featured:
When I pulled into the lot, I ran (okay, I guess it was more of a power-walk) into the building only to find my classroom deserted. Totally empty. I had been absent the previous class period, and apparently missed the memo that there was no class today. BOO.
I stomped back to my car, now conveniently and uselessly defrosted, drove to my apartment, and continued my frustrated stomping into my living room. I was inwardly grumbling when I put some leftover enchiladas into the microwave in an attempt to eat my crankies away. As I settled down on the couch to dig in, I saw this clip on "The Soup," and it honestly made my bad day turn good. I laughed so hard I cried, and I ALMOST had to spit out my half-chewed food. Bless Joel McHale's sarcastic and occasionally profane little heart.
Edit: Youtube wouldn't let me embed the clip from the soup, so here is some footage of the dog it featured:
1.25.2009
And now for something totally original and not at all late...
My New Years Resolutions.... (It's still January, OK? don't judge me)
1. Write in my journal semi-daily, and blog weekly.
2. Go down a dress size.
3. Resist the urge to weigh myself every time I come within a 50 mile radius of a scale... and stop hanging my self esteem on the amount of force the earth's gravitational pull has on me.
4. Pay off all my credit card debt, or at least most of it.
5. Be painfully honest, especially when something/someone is bugging me.
6. Read 50 new books...and some of them will be classics
1. Write in my journal semi-daily, and blog weekly.
2. Go down a dress size.
3. Resist the urge to weigh myself every time I come within a 50 mile radius of a scale... and stop hanging my self esteem on the amount of force the earth's gravitational pull has on me.
4. Pay off all my credit card debt, or at least most of it.
5. Be painfully honest, especially when something/someone is bugging me.
6. Read 50 new books...and some of them will be classics
1.05.2009
Good old Murphy's Law....
Murphy's Law: (noun) an adage in Western culture that broadly states, "if anything can go wrong, it will." It is also cited as: "If there's more than one possible outcome of a job or task, and one of those outcomes will result in disaster or an undesirable consequence, then somebody will do it that way"; "Anything that can go wrong, will," the similar "Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong," or, "Whatever can go wrong will go wrong, and at the worst possible time, in the worst possible way."
Warning: This blog is going to be full of my whiney-complaining.
I've decided that it's okay to hate Murphy's Law (since, being a 'cultural adage', it doesn't have feelings). I had to search long and hard for something to hate today, because all of the people and organizations involved in the explosion of bad luck that has settled on my lap in the past few days have been uncannily polite and kind - in a word, blameless.
So, I had to channel my frustration somewhere else- and I think that it's okay to rail and berate a proverb instead.
Tami's List Of Awesomely Epic Fail-age
1. Having my car towed from the parking lot next to the stadium (that one was my fault, actually - I didnt' know that it wasn't allowed to have your car there overnight!)
2. Not discovering that it had been towed until a week and a half after the fact, (since I was in Utah for Christmas) racking up $525 in storage fees - plus the initial $100 towing fee.
3. Since I wasn't able to pick it up until 3 days after I had gotten back into town, (the place was closed until today) I had to walk to Walmart on Saturday. I had food, but I was out of deoderant. Boo. Deo is something I refuse to go without. I can't handle being stinky. Anyways. It took about an hour, and on the way I slipped in the snow, fell on my knee, and tore a hole in my favorite jeans (the ones that magically make my tushy look small).
4. After picking up my car, turning it on in the parking lot to warm up, getting out to brush the snow off and shutting the door behind me (with my purse inside), I remembered that my doors sometimes lock themselves in the cold.
5. Yep, I was locked out of my car for 45 minutes. Outside. In the snow. Alone. No boots, no coat. In the creepy parking lot of Barney's Towing & Repair.
Okay, so that list was alot shorter than it felt like it should have been. On the brighter side....
Tami's List of Moderately Epic Win-age
1. On my way out of Walmart, my old roomie drove by and asked if I needed a ride home. WIN!
2. I was able to haggle down the towing and storage fee down from $625 to $300. Go me!
3. The towing place I picked my car up from had someone that they were able to call to jimmy the locks on my door. They were super nice, and almost apologetic that they even towed my car.
4. Mom was comforting, suppotive and calm when I told her how much it was going to cost. PS, my mom's the best.
5. I will never take my car & independence for granted again. I also discovered that I have a hard time asking for rides and help - something I need to work on.
6. School doesn't start till Wednesday, so I still have plenty of time to get books and such.
7. I was able to get home safely, and cheer myself up by looking at Failblog. EPIC WIN!
Here are some funny 'Fails' that put things in perspective for me....
"DOUBLE FAIL"
"CABLE FAIL"
"DANCE FAIL"
"SPEEDING TICKET FAIL"
Warning: This blog is going to be full of my whiney-complaining.
I've decided that it's okay to hate Murphy's Law (since, being a 'cultural adage', it doesn't have feelings). I had to search long and hard for something to hate today, because all of the people and organizations involved in the explosion of bad luck that has settled on my lap in the past few days have been uncannily polite and kind - in a word, blameless.
So, I had to channel my frustration somewhere else- and I think that it's okay to rail and berate a proverb instead.
1. Having my car towed from the parking lot next to the stadium (that one was my fault, actually - I didnt' know that it wasn't allowed to have your car there overnight!)
2. Not discovering that it had been towed until a week and a half after the fact, (since I was in Utah for Christmas) racking up $525 in storage fees - plus the initial $100 towing fee.
3. Since I wasn't able to pick it up until 3 days after I had gotten back into town, (the place was closed until today) I had to walk to Walmart on Saturday. I had food, but I was out of deoderant. Boo. Deo is something I refuse to go without. I can't handle being stinky. Anyways. It took about an hour, and on the way I slipped in the snow, fell on my knee, and tore a hole in my favorite jeans (the ones that magically make my tushy look small).
4. After picking up my car, turning it on in the parking lot to warm up, getting out to brush the snow off and shutting the door behind me (with my purse inside), I remembered that my doors sometimes lock themselves in the cold.
5. Yep, I was locked out of my car for 45 minutes. Outside. In the snow. Alone. No boots, no coat. In the creepy parking lot of Barney's Towing & Repair.
Okay, so that list was alot shorter than it felt like it should have been. On the brighter side....
1. On my way out of Walmart, my old roomie drove by and asked if I needed a ride home. WIN!
2. I was able to haggle down the towing and storage fee down from $625 to $300. Go me!
3. The towing place I picked my car up from had someone that they were able to call to jimmy the locks on my door. They were super nice, and almost apologetic that they even towed my car.
4. Mom was comforting, suppotive and calm when I told her how much it was going to cost. PS, my mom's the best.
5. I will never take my car & independence for granted again. I also discovered that I have a hard time asking for rides and help - something I need to work on.
6. School doesn't start till Wednesday, so I still have plenty of time to get books and such.
7. I was able to get home safely, and cheer myself up by looking at Failblog. EPIC WIN!
Here are some funny 'Fails' that put things in perspective for me....
"DOUBLE FAIL"
"CABLE FAIL"
"DANCE FAIL"
"SPEEDING TICKET FAIL"
1.03.2009
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)