...these words are my diary, screaming out loud...

First weeks of class

2012-01-18T17:59:00.000-07:00

I am officially back in school, and officially swamped with a bazillion things that need to be done all at once. Gahh. However, one of my New Years resolutions, yet again, is to blog at least once a week (and I missed out on most of January already). So...

In Sum:
I made the trek up to Rexburg and got moved into my apartment with help from my trusty, box-moving dad. (Thanks pop!) I have one of the same roommates as I had the last time I was up here (hi Jen!) which is FANTASTIC. I cannot stress enough how key having room mates who are on the same wavelength as yourself is when it comes to things like tidiness. It can effect the entire living experience. Seriously. Such a relief.

My classes: I am nerdily thrilled with the material I get to read and write about this semester. I'm taking Family Foundations (a religion class, which has The Family Proclamation as the basis for all of the material we cover), The Middle East (taught by a man who lived in the middle east for 7 years and has a deep love and respect for the culture and people there) Postmodernism (oh man!! This is contemporary fiction from 1965 up until the present. Our texts are books that have been on my to-read list for eons, so I am more than a little pumped to get into it) and Advanced Literary Criticism, which sounds scary and boring, but I assure you it is not. My teacher is from Boston and talks with a New Yawk accent, and during the first period alone we discussed Aristotle, Shakespeare, and Escher and how they relate to literature. Amazing. Also, he looks like Dustin Hoffman, so just being there is an entertaining experience. I also have Science 101, which has not proved utterly mind-numbing yet, so that's a good sign.

My life: I got called to be the 1st Counselor in Relief Society (a women's organization in our church) and wow. It takes up a lot of time, but apparently I had plenty of random time stored away in nooks and crannies that went unused over past semesters, because somehow I am finding time to fit it in. I also started work again this week. I am still unsure where all the hours I require in each week for work and study and service and class are going to come from, but so far I'm alive and kicking. I haven't even had to borrow Hermione Granger's time-turner yet. (I knew I could work a Harry Potter reference in there somewhere. High-five.)

Dear Bloggie,

2011-12-27T22:24:00.000-07:00

Oh hello. I know I've been neglecting you over the past few weeks. Sorry. I've been busy working, but that is no excuse. I had a fantastic Christmas with my family and ate too many cookies and lots of fudge. I've taken the week off of work to pack, but I've mainly been watching Modern Family on Sidereel.com. It is hilarious. I love how little Manny is a 40 year old trapped in a 12 year old's body, and conversely, Phil is a 12 year old trapped in a 40 year old's body.

I've also been doing a great deal of thinking about all the organizing and packing I have to do over the next 6 days. Unfortunately, I usually get distracted and end up watching TV or painting my nails instead of doing anything productive. I go to Rexburg in 6 days, and am not yet frazzled by the prospect. I suppose I should start packing now so that I don't have an absolute unpreparedness-triggered moving panic attack come Monday morning.

Toodles,
Tami

Meet Anxiety Cat.

2011-12-06T00:00:00.008-07:00

I came across this little fellow on memegenerator (a site on which I waste an embarrassing amount of time giggling quietly to myself) and it made me laugh so hard. It's like he is the absolute personification (or cat-ification?) of every ounce of social anxiety/shyness/OCD stress I have ever experienced. Enjoy.

Thunder thighs and my body image.

2011-11-22T13:14:00.004-07:00

I saw a picture this week, a very recent one, of myself. Even though I've lost close to 40 pounds in the last year and a half (which, yay!), I still zeroed in on the one area of my body I've never been happy with, no matter how skinny I've been - my thighs. Oh, my thighs. They have always been hell-bent on constantly being large and jiggly.

As I stared at them in disgust, I had an epiphany. If I approach my appearance with an ever critical eye, I will never be thin enough. Or toned enough. Or cute enough. Or even tanned enough. No matter how supportive and complimentary people are towards me, if I lose the weight only in order to 'fix' myself, it will never be enough.

However, if I accept my body as it is right here and right now (jiggles, cellulite, whiteness and all), I have already won. Focusing on becoming healthier, as opposed to fixing what I perceive as defects, will be enough.

Hooray.

It's always darkest before the dawn.

2011-11-11T00:28:00.007-07:00

Another post dedicated to an awesome new album that I must gush about to anyone who will listen. Because I love my music to the point of total nerddom. Deal. With. It.

Artist: Florence + The Machine
Album: Ceremonials
My thoughts: So beautiful. Quirky, happy, and occasionally mysterious. The arrangements and beats are brilliantly layered; each song feels like a unique little story. Just like with their last album, Lungs, there are certain songs on this record that make me so happy that while listening to it on the road, I get the urge to jump on top of my car and just start dancing in the middle of an intersection. (Don't worry, I haven't. Yet.) There are also a few tracks that are spooky that I haven't completely been won over by yet, but I know I will be. Because that is just how good these guys are.
Favorite Tracks: Shake It Out, Only If for a Night, All This and Heaven Too

*As a sidenote, there is one detail that pains me about Florence + The Machine. As a lover of music videos, I was really excited to check theirs out. When I heard that the Dog Days are Over video won an MTV music video award, I knew I had to watch it. So I did - and I was left wondering precisely when during the experience I dropped acid. Blue genie women in gold dresses and scary kabuki doll makeup? Check and check. Masked purple ninjas banging on some bongo drums? Why of course!
Seriously.
It's terrifying.
I really don't want to post the video here because it will freak you out and could make you hate their music, which would be tragic. So instead, here is a little screencap to illustrate my point:

Oh well.

It's mah birfday! and some random facts.

2011-11-07T00:08:00.001-07:00

I had a fantastic birthday yesterday. I was even given the gift of an extra hour of sleep by the universe (thank you daylight savings time! I forgive you for being an unnecessary annoyance to the modern world). My sister Jackie came down to Utah for the weekend, and so my entire family was together. It was awesome. We had presents, cake, and crepe paper decorations (an old family tradition that was supposed to die out once we were no longer little kids, but has endured).

So I am now 26. I am fully loving it, but personally accepting the inevitability of aging is a new development. When I hit 25, I had this inexplicable wave of horror wash over me when I realized that I was only 5 years away from being 30. That just seemed so....old. However, just because I am not precisely where I imagined I would be in my late 20's, I am entirely who I want to be. I think that matters more than the fact that I haven't yet reached the milestones that I expected I would have by now.

So, in honor of self-acceptance, here are 5 little-known (or quirky) things about me:

1. I swear too much, even though it's often just under my breath. I know I ought to stop because it's not ladylike and it's getting out of control. For example: The other day, I was exiting the 7-11 in Kaysville after getting a nice big fountain drink of Dr. Pepper. The door slammed my arm as I was walking through on my way out, and it hurt like the dickens. For a horrible moment I was in danger of losing my 32 oz fountain drink all over myself so i mumbled, "ohsh*t!" under my breath. Apparently it wasn't as quiet as I thought it was, because some dude looked up and stared at me the whole way out to my car. I'm sorry I offended your delicate sensibilities, young man, but you were wearing a backwards hat and didn't look like you were full of high society social norms.

2. Most of my wardrobe looks more like it belongs to a 13-year-old than a 26-year-old. It's mostly because I just like tee shirts and sneakers, ok? And also, because I have a secret desire to be on TLC's What not to Wear. I have literally imagined the things that Clinton Kelly would say to me while flinging all my crew neck graphic tees into the garbage can.

3. I am not ambidextrous when flipping off idiot drivers. (another habit I need to quit)

4. When I am at work and extremely bored between surveys, I play the alphabet game in my head. The alphabet game goes like this: Think of a fairly specific category, and then think of a word or name from that category for each letter of the alphabet. The other day, I chose 'first names of characters that appear in books I own.' (Aberforth, Bella, Carlton, Diana... etc) It is a fabulous way to make the day go by quickly.

5. I was a shamelessly compulsive liar up until I was about 7 or 8 years old, when I apparently grew a conscience. For instance: I once told my best friend in the second grade that we had 'lost' my younger sister at the mall. (We hadn't.) I wove the story very dramatically and was apparently very convincing because that afternoon, my friend's very concerned mother called my house to ask my mom if they had found my younger sibling. Busted.

concert review: MCR & Blink 182

2011-10-21T23:23:00.001-06:00

So, I went to a concert last month. It was super fun, and therefore deserves a post. I am just really behind on blogging. In sum:

I went with my great friends Robyn and Megan.

It was not the best live show I've ever been to, but I still had a blast because I was with my besties. However, I probably won't be going to a Blink 182 concert again (Oh, yea, by the way - the bands were Blink 182 and My Chemical Romance). Because even though Travis killed it on the drums (it sounded like no animal with less than 8 arms could have done all that crazy stuff), and even though their songs were catchy as ever, they have a REALLY VULGAR stage act. Like, tasteless. I shouldn't have been shocked, because Meg, who had been to their shows before tried to warn me. "Uh, Tami, are you sure? Blink kind of... swears a lot at concerts."
"Meh! That's ok. I don't listen to lyrics that much anyways."

The problem is, you really don't get a sense of how crude they are when you buy their music edited - which I do. And having it blared through an awesomely loud sound system doesn't really give you much of a choice in how much you notice. So, their act was an eye-opening experience. Yikes. It was also a little bit sad, because aging rock stars with receding hairlines are depressing. (I'm sorry, Mark Hoppus. But you seriously are going bald.)

But now, we will talk about My *cough cough secret husbands* Chemical Romance. They are who I really went to see. They are those tiny, tiny blue and purple lights on stage wayyyyy behind me:

I had assumed that Blink and MCR would be co-headlining, and would each take turns as the main attractions. Instead MCR opened and did a short, 45-minute set. Wahhhhh. Their sound system and stage set up wasn't as cool as Blink's, since they weren't the headliners - but they still sounded amazing. They are one of my favorite bands, and they didn't disappoint. I would do it all over again to see them perform. Their music is so personal and piercing. It tears my little heart out and I love it. They played a beautiful rock set full of my faves including Helena, I'm not Okay, Cancer, Na Na Na, and their arrangements were slightly different and more dramatic and instrumental than their studio albums. It was very theatrical.

In short, we had a great time. Also, we saw lots of people with fascinatingly ugly hair. Like this young lad:

I felt his hair needed to be documented, but I was torn between getting close enough to snap a good picture without being noticed, or getting too close and risking getting poked with his spikes if I angered him.

Dear Autumn,

2011-10-07T19:38:00.002-06:00

You are a great season. One of my favorites. Bright yellow leaves, the introduction to the holiday season, and feeling so cozy in my car with the heater blasting - all of those are fabulous. However, I wish that you would last longer - or how about you stick around all the way through til Spring? You lasted only a week or two this year, you fickle minx.

Here's the thing. Your little sister, Winter, is heinous. I hate her more than the Grinch hated Christmas. In fact, I sort of turn into the Grinch once Christmas passes, and the snow and sleet and ice are left behind but are no longer nostalgic and festive. They're just cold. Painfully so, especially once I've moved down to Idaho. And then I start to lose my mind a little bit, and-oh-my-gosh-it's-April-why-is-it-still-snowing....ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Please, see what you can do about it.
Love, Tami

Dog Shenanigans

2011-10-06T00:18:00.005-06:00

My poor baby dog, Lady, got an unintentional bikini wax last week.

So, she (the dog) has this habit of running into my room and skedaddling under my bed for fun. She's sassy, and probably does it because she knows she doesn't have free range yet throughout the house. To avoid getting caught and thrown out of my room, she army crawls to the exact middle underneath the bed, so that I can't grab her. Earlier this month, I had placed some of those glue-board spider traps under there (which by the way, I find so rewarding to look at because once they've caught and killed some huge ugly spiders, they leave them on display for me to laugh at). I heard a pitiful whimpering noise coming from under my bed, so I leaned down to look. Lady had gotten a glue board stuck on one of her paws and one stuck on her butt. In a frenzied panic, she somehow managed to yank the one on her paw off, but she shot out from under my bed with the second glue board still stuck to one of her furry little butt cheeks.

I enlisted my mom's help, and we tried to think of a way to get it off as painlessly as possible. We decided on the 'band-aid method' - tear it off really quickly and be done with it. The glue on those sons-of-guns are very thick and very sticky, so as I held her and my mom yanked it off, the glue board came away with pretty much all of the loose fur from Lady's booty. It didn't result in any bald spots, thank goodness, but I could tell it was not the most pleasant thing she had ever experienced.

She has not gone under my bed since.

how to avoid negativity

2011-09-25T22:50:00.005-06:00

I found this fabulous info-graphic through Pinterest (originally posted on The Secret Yumiverse) a while ago, and I love it. LOVE IT. For many reasons. Because, not only is it hilarious, but I've also found that a few of the techniques it outlines are incredibly effective when I have to deal with a meanie-jerk on the phone at work.

There have been many times that I have had to take a deep breath, and imagine an invisible force-field full of positive thoughts (#5) as a barrier between me and the jerk-monster on the phone, where all their meanness just bounces off. It works! Try it. I also like the one about every jerk monster having a sad human being trapped inside of it. When I try to remember this, it helps to humanize even the most obnoxious, vicious people, which makes it possible to send some compassion their way.

Dear Emma Stone,

2011-09-21T00:14:00.008-06:00

You have made me realize that my ghostly pale complexion is not fundamentally ugly. Thanks for making all of us whiter-than-chalk-even-in-the-middle-of-summer-girls feel a little bit prettier.

Love, Tami

August

2011-09-13T22:44:00.007-06:00

Oh hello there. I had a fabulous August, thank you very much. It was full and fun and sunny, just like summer months should be.

I got my old job back (whew! relief!) which is awesome. I like survey work, weirdly enough, and I get to work full time. I sit at a desk all day and do crossword puzzles in between calls. I really don't mind calling people because 50% of the time, there is no answer/or I get an answering machine. 30% of the time, someone answers, but then they hang up after they hear the word 'survey.' (Don't worry. You don't hurt my feelings. I get it.) 10% of the time, a human being speaks back to me from the other end of the line, but they say they don't have time to do it, don't want to do it, or ask me to take them off my calling list (which I actually prefer, between that and rescheduling, because we don't want to call you back if you have no desire to ever do a survey and know you're never going to do it). That last 10% actually do the survey with me, with varying levels of enthusiasm. I love that 10%. I want to hug them forever (figuratively). I may or may not have added those up correctly to 100%. I'm an English major, so I'm not too hot at math.

So when I wasn't working, I went camping/boating in Flaming Gorge with my family and actually got some color on my legs (shocking!), and went to Park City over a weekend with some girlfriends, Robyn & Meg. It was a spectacular month. I can't find any pictures of Flaming Gorge, probably because I'm lazy and never take any pictures. However, here are some pictures from Park City. Which, oh man. I loved the shopping there. I think I need to go to those outlets every time I shop. They have the hugest discounts. Meg thankfully took these while we were there.

Me, Robyn, our yummy drinks, and my sunburned neckline.

Me, Megan, and my accidental 80's bra-strap exposure.

Megan 'pretending' to shut the murphy bed at (Robyn's family condo) with me still in it. Apparently, my double chin comes out and shows itself when I look scared. Like a frilled lizard. Just ignore it.

Fun! September has been pretty awesome so far as well! More on that later. Promise.

Honey, I'm home.

2011-07-31T01:18:00.009-06:00

I am not sure why I can't call Rexburg 'Home' yet, or if I will before I graduate (in 5-ish semesters). I live there 7 months out of the year, but there is an intangible pull towards my house and family in Kaysville that makes it my real home, even though I'm an adult and normally I would have my own place - full time - to live in by now.

I like it anyways. I love being back, and I am almost completely moved in. I have no idea how on earth I fit all of my crap into my room. I think it multiplies in my closet when I'm not looking. I packed and stored most of it at a unit in Rexburg, but still - there is SO MUCH of it. I felt like a wizard when I was able to fit it all in my car, using nothing but my own two hands to move it all.

So, I am home! And I have been unpacking, but have otherwise been quite lazy & laid back this week. I am crossing my fingers that my old workplace has a spot for me. Wish me luck on that, or I may have to do the whole take-two-jobs-at-once-in-order-to-make-enough-money thing again. Bleh.

Oh, and also, I slipped down the stairs yesterday in a very painful and hilarious fashion. I did that thing where you put your foot juuuuuuust too far off of the carpeted step, and your foot slips out from under you. I threw my arms up, my phone flew out of my hands & hit the wall really hard (luckily, it made it through unscathed). In my wacky flailing, trying to find something to hold onto mid-fall, I bonked the flabby under part of my arm on the banister post. Yowzer. It hurts. I was going to take a picture of it to impress you with my toughness, but it doesn't look that impressive. It's just a large, nasty, speckled bruise.

Lady, our dog, witnessed the whole thing. After being freaked out for a moment and staring at me, she seemed to decide I was playing some kind of new game and started jumping on my sprawled body. She's such a weirdo. It's a good thing she's cute.

Photo from my sis Colie

Harry Potter Notable Quotables: 6 & 7

2011-07-13T00:18:00.005-06:00

Oh man, you guys. The premiere is this week!

Book 6 - Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

"Ah, good evening Harry," said Dumbledore, looking up at him through his half-moon glasses with a most satisfied expression. "Excellent, excellent."

These words seemed to rouse Uncle Vernon. It was clear that as far as he was concerned, any man who could look at Harry and say "excellent" was a man with whom he could never see eye to eye.

"I don't mean to be rude--" he began, in a tone that threatened rudeness in every syllable.

"--yet, sadly, accidental rudeness occurs alarmingly often," Dumbledore finished the sentence gravely. "Best to say nothing at all, my dear man."
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"And now, Harry, let us step out into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure."
-Dumbledore
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"Ginny came in to visit while you were unconscious," he [Ron] said, after a long pause, and Harry's imagination zoomed into overdrive, rapidly constructing a scene in which Ginny, weeping over his lifeless form, confessed her feelings of deep attraction to him while Ron game them his blessing..."She reckons you only just arrived on time for the match."
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Book 7- Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Harry glanced over at the dark shapes they made on the floor beside him. Ron had had a fit of gallantry and insisted that Hermione sleep on the cushions from the sofa, so that her silhouette was raised above his.
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Amycus moved forward until he was offensively close to Professor McGonagall, his face within inches of hers. She refused to back away, but looked down at him as if he were something disgusting she had found stuck to a lavatory seat.
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From the tip of his wand burst the silver doe: She landed on the office floor, bounded once across the office, and soared out of the window. Dumbledore watched her fly away, and as her silvery glow faded he turned back to Snape, and his eyes were full of tears.

"After all this time?"

"Always," said Snape.
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"Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and, above all, those who live without love."
-Dumbledore
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The house-elves of Hogwarts swarmed into the entrance hall, screaming and waving carving knives and cleavers, and at their head, the locket of Regulus Black bouncing on his chest, was Kreacher, his bullfrog's voice audible even above this din [...] They were hacking and stabbing at the ankles and shins of Death Eaters, their tiny faces alive with malice, and everywhere Harry looked Death Eaters were folding under sheer weight of numbers, overcome by spells, dragging arrows from wounds, stabbed in the leg by elves, or else simply attempting to escape, but swallowed by the oncoming horde.

4th of July Family-palooza

2011-07-11T01:25:00.010-06:00

This last week, we went as a family to Island Park and stayed in the most adorable little cabin you ever did see. I loved it. Even though I got bitten alive by bugs, wore entirely the wrong shoes hiking on a certain fishing expedition, and was terrified 60% of the time that I was going to meet my end as the meal of a grizzly bear, I had fun. I would do it all over again. Somehow I managed to not get tan - AT ALL. I think I have albino genes. Here are some pictures: (courtesy of my little sis Michelle - I am too lazy to take any)

Me, backwards-modeling a pair of PJs that had a trap door in back:

Me and the sissies:

Me, sinking in some quicksand in a lake (and probably swearing in my head):

Papa Booth snoozing:

The marrieds:

Good ol' Lake Hebgen:

Harry Potter Notable Quotables: Book 5

2011-07-01T23:47:00.005-06:00

When Sirius wrested a large golden ring bearing the Black crest from his grip Kreacher actually burst into furious tears and left the room sobbing under his breath and calling Sirius names Harry had never heard before.

"It was my father's," said Sirius, throwing the ring into the sack. "Kreacher wasn't quite as devoted to him as to my mother, but I still caught him snogging a pair of my father's old trousers last week."

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"How're you feeling?" Ginny asked Ron, who was now staring into the dregs of milk at the bottom of his empty cereal bowl as though seriously considering attempting to drown himself in them.

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"Harry, I owe you an explanation," said Dumbledore. "An explanation of an old man's mistakes. For I see now that what I have done, and not done, with regard to you, bears all the hallmarks of the failings of age. Youth cannot know how age thinks and feels. But old men are guilty if they forget what it was to be young."

What I've been up to

2011-06-23T13:50:00.007-06:00

I have been a busy girl, so my blog has been rather neglected. I am currently:

- schooling full time
- working part time
- being awesome all the time

JK, I made that last one up. That list seems shorter than it should be. Oh, yea, I also started an Etsy shop because I have a really poor grasp on how many hours are actually in a day. It is a blast. It's a work in progress, so more on that later.

I do still fear that I'll not be able to keep juggling everything and I'll have a mental breakdown and be found by my roommates at the end of the semester rocking back and forth in my closet with my eyes glazed over mumbling things about possessive pronouns and Mesopotamian trade routes. If that is the case, you'll know why.

Lurve, Tami

Classroom Quotes

2011-06-18T23:03:00.005-06:00

Both from my Grammar professor:

"...will you be marked down if you don't put a comma there? Only if your teacher is a Hitler-psychopath. I don't really care."

"I should warn you. If you become a fantasy author, you will cause kids to become nerds. Can you live with that?"

Quote of the Day

2011-05-23T19:58:00.003-06:00

from my professor:

"My son went through a slightly rebellious stage - he started wearing beanies and I know for a fact that he was listening to Beastie Boys."

Dear Royal Newlyweds,

2011-05-20T09:42:00.005-06:00

You had the raddest wedding ever, complete with a carriage ride through the streets and an adorably cranky junior bridesmaid.

I didn't think I could love you even more than I do, but then I read this. And it happened: I love you even more.

You don't have a staff - no cook, no butler, no limo drivers - nothing (well, besides security, but duh). You live a shockingly normal, modest life for the future King and Queen of the oldest surviving monarchy in the world.

What I'm trying to say is...
Can we be besties? So you can invite me over for tea and crumpets at your grandma's place and I can play with her corgis while I wear a fancy hat? Pleeeeeeease? (Have your people call my people.)
Love,
Tami

Dream Spectrum

2011-05-10T14:47:00.004-06:00

Sometimes, I have dreams so fantastical and bizarre that I wonder where on earth my brain comes up with this stuff. Other times, though, my dreams are so incredibly mundane and normal that I wonder why my subconscious even bothers to whip them up. Maybe I just don't know how to have dreams that are in the normalcy mid-range. For example, last night I dreamed that I bought a really great hi-liter from the bookstore. In my dream, I then went home and studied and was really impressed by how great the hi-liter worked.

That's all. I woke up, and I kind of wanted to go to the bookstore to check out their selection of hi-liters.

Harry Potter Notable Quotables: Book 4

2011-05-01T21:36:00.004-06:00

AKA "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire"
Chapter 5 (Harry and Ron, speaking about Ron's zealous older brother Percy):

"Percy's enjoying work, then?" said Harry, sitting down on one of the beds and watching the Chudley Cannons zooming in and out of the posters on the ceiling.

"Enjoying it?" said Ron darkly. "I don't reckon he'd come home if Dad didn't make him. He's obsessed. Just don't get him onto the subject of his boss. According to Mr. Crouch... as I was saying to Mr. Crouch... Mr. Crouch is of the opinion... Mr. Crouch was telling me... They'll be announcing their engagement any day now."

Chapter 12 (Harry observing the first years' arrival)

Professor McGonagall was leading a long line of first years up to the top of the Hall. If Harry, Ron, and Hermione were wet, it was nothing to how these first years looked. They appeared to have swum across the lake rather than sailed. All of them were shivering with a combination of cold and nerves as they filed along the staff table and came to a halt in a line facing the rest of the school - all of them except the smallest of the lot, a boy with mousy hair, who was wrapped in what Harry recognized as Hagrid's moleskin overcoat. The coat was so big for him that it looked as though he were draped in a furry black circus tent. His small face protruded from over the collar, looking almost painfully excited. When he had lined up with his terrified-looking peers, he caught Colin Creevy's eye, gave a double thumbs-up, and mouthed, I fell in the lake! He looked positively delighted about it.

Chapter 19:

It is a strange thing, but when you are dreading something, and would give anything to slow down time, it has a disobliging habit of speeding up.

Chapter 21 (Ron):

"Percy wouldn't recognize a joke if it danced naked in front of him wearing Dobby's tea cozy."

Chapter 27 (Sirius Black):

"If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals."

HP 7.2 Trailer + bonus Tami reaction video

2011-04-29T23:52:00.011-06:00

......I die.

I have no words to describe how awesome this movie is going to be. I am such a potter nerd that I almost teared up when I watched it. I was curious how my face looked while I watched it - so I recorded my reaction (the fifth time through). It's entertaining. Please ignore my double chin & non-makeup zit face & the way it's kind of distorted (my laptop was on my tummy and I was laying down).

The part where I giggle halfway through is when Harry tries to get Voldy to hug it out with him while falling off a tower. (sooo not in the book). Fave Youtube trailer comment:

"Scene 1
Harry: Expelliarmus!
Voldemort: NYEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!!!

Scene 2
Voldemort: Nyeeeeeeehhhh!!!!!!

Scene 3
Voldy: Why do you live?
Harry: Because I have something worth living for!
Voldy: NYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH!!!"

Songs of the day/month

2011-04-27T15:33:00.002-06:00

So, as you know, I love Eisley.

They came out with a new album last month and I have had it on repeat since I bought it. Their music just makes me so happy. I could blab all day long about how genius they are and why I love their music, but instead I'll sum it up: It's like auditory narcotics. My faves from the album: Mr. Moon, Oxygen Mask and The Valley.

(I could only find a streaming file for one of the tracks, but seriously. Preview them all on iTunes. You won't be sorry.)

Ozz Wozz

2011-04-22T23:54:00.007-06:00

I never figured I would ever become an animal person. Especially a dog person. Especially a person who loved her doggie so much she would blog about him.

We had to put our lovey weird dog Ozzie down last week. He had what I like to call Dr.Jekyll/Mr. Hyde syndrome. Most of the time he was a sweet tempered, friendly, galloping doofus of a dog. However, when people came over to our house that he didn't know or didn't remember that he knew, he would bite them.

It started out innocently enough; Whenever he got loose as a baby dog, he used to just chase people around in a playful puppy way before we could corral him inside. Then, as a teenager dog, he started to nip at people's pants while he chased them - and finally, over the last year or so, he began biting those he chased. Hard.

I had no idea how attached to him I was. I mourned. Like, literally. Stayed in my bed all day long the day afterwards and read Harry Potter and played on my laptop. All day.

I feel comforted by the fact that we did everything we could to solve the problem before putting him down. We tried: obedience school, puppy prozac, a permanent baby gate separating the downstairs from the front door so he couldn't get outside or bite our guests, getting a special harness for walks that he couldn't slip out of, walking him in the dead of night so we wouldn't endanger the neighborhood, etc.

In the words of 'Doctah' Moss (our Australian - or is he British? - veterinarian) while he spoke with us in his office the day we had to put Ozz to sleep, "We know your family. We know you love your animals."

We really do.

Ozzie went very peacefully. He was comfortable and quite happy and we petted him until he was gone.

To stop myself from having a full-blown blogging cryfest, here are some pictures of one of his favorite pastimes: photobombing our family pictures.

Harry Potter Notable Quotables: Book 3

2011-04-06T15:44:00.005-06:00

AKA "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban"
Chapter 1 (Harry's homework from A History of Magic):

"Non-magic people (more commonly known as Muggles) were particularly afraid of magic in medieval times, but not very good at recognizing it. On the rare occasion that they did catch a real witch or wizard, burning had no effect whatsoever. The witch or wizard would perform a basic Flame Freezing Charm and then pretend to shriek with pain while enjoying a gentle, tickling sensation. Indeed, Wendelin the Weird enjoyed being burned so much that she allowed herself to be caught no less than forty-seven times in various disguises."

Chapter 2 (Uncle Vernon to Harry)

"We told Marge you attend St. Brutus's Secure Center for Incurably Criminal Boys."

Chapter 5 (Professor Dumbledore):

"Well, I am sorry to tell you that Professor Kettleburn, our Care of Magical Creatures teacher, retired at the end of last year in order to enjoy more time with his remaining limbs."

Chapter 22 (Professor Dumbledore):

"You think the dead we loved ever truly leave us? You think that we don't recall them more clearly than ever in times of great trouble? Your father is alive in you, Harry, and shows himself most plainly when you have need of him."

It was a horse, of course.

2011-04-03T15:48:00.003-06:00

Dearest Universe,

While I was driving along the highway, thank you for letting me pass a horse trailer while its horsey occupant was having a full-fledged headbanging fit. I think he was trying to wiggle his rope loose, but his antics also matched up to the beat of my song Per.fect.ly. It looked like he was totally enjoying my tunes. A perk unique to Rexburg: passing horse trailers so regularly that this was bound to happen sooner or later.

Sincerely,
Me

Getting OLD

2011-03-27T23:10:00.002-06:00

So. I found two more grey hairs this week...except this time, they were in my eyebrows.

MY EYEBROWS.

The prospect of getting older seemed so glamorous and exciting when I was young. Pop culture always glosses over the not-so-fun parts of aging and instead focuses on the fun parts - going to college, starting a family, buying a house, planning a career, becoming a certified adult citizen...

But definitely not finding rogue albino white hairs in your eyebrows at age 25.

Harry Potter Notable Quotables

2011-03-20T15:59:00.001-06:00

I am attempting to re-read all seven Harry Potter books before the release of the final (sniffle) movie this July. While doing so, I've been re-encountering hilarious and touching quotes that I had forgotten existed. These are the gems I've collected so far. For the uninitiated, I've included some background information to explain the quotes and why I love them.

Book 1: Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

Harry sat up and gasped; the glass front of the boa constrictor's tank had vanished. The great snake was uncoiling itself rapidly, slithering out onto the floor. People throughout the reptile house screamed and started running for the exits.

As the snake slid swiftly past him, Harry could have sworn a low, hissing voice said, "Brazil, here I come... Thanksss, amigo."

- The Boa Constrictor at the Zoo, Chapter 2. Harry had accidentally made the glass in the snake enclosure vanish. (In the movie during this scene, the snake only says, 'thanksssssss,' and while that is funny, the addition of 'amigo' made me LOL.)

"Ah! Berty Bott's Every Flavor Beans! I was unfortunate enough in my youth to come across a vomit-flavored one, and since then I'm afraid I've rather lost my liking for them - but I think I'll be safe with a nice toffee, don't you?"

He smiled and popped the golden-brown bean into his mouth. Then he choked and said, "Alas! Ear wax!"

- Professor Dumbledore, Chapter 17

Book 2: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

The pudding fell to the floor with a heart-stopping crash. Cream splattered the windows and walls as the dish shattered. With a crack like a whip, Dobby vanished.

There were screams from the dining room and Uncle Vernon burst into the kitchen to find Harry, rigid with shock, covered from head to foot in Aunt Petunia's pudding.

At first, it looked as though Uncle Vernon would manage to gloss the whole thing over. ("Just our nephew - very disturbed - meeting strangers upsets him, so we kept him upstairs...")

- Uncle Vernon, Chapter 2. Harry's uncle and aunt had guests over, and had hidden Harry upstairs and told him not to make any noise. Unfortunately, Dobby the house-elf came for a visit and caused mayhem.

"It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."

- Professor Dumbledore, Chapter 18

I'm reading a book.

2011-03-11T12:22:00.004-07:00

I went to a workshop yesterday, and they showed this. It made me giggle. His voice is kind of frightening, and that is what makes it funny to me.

Hhh-hhh-hhhuhhh

2011-02-23T15:55:00.006-07:00

At work, as soon as I hear the distinctive bell tone that precedes the phone line being opened, I've trained myself to chime in with 'Hi, This is..." or 'Hello, may I please speak with..." It is practically involuntary. However, hearing the bell tone only proceeds the line being put through, whether it hooks me up to a ringing phone, an answering machine, or a busy signal.

Sometimes, I start saying 'hi' or 'hello' before I realize am not actually talking to a human being and I instinctively cut myself off before I'm finished with the first syllable. So I just go 'hhh' or hhheh.' Try it yourself. Take a deep breath and start to say 'Hello' but cut yourself off to see what it sounds like. It makes me laugh every time without fail because it sounds so bizarre. Laughing quietly to myself probably earns me even more weird points to anyone who is observing me, but I really don't care.

Ice Skating: not for the awkward

2011-02-20T14:26:00.009-07:00

Rexburg has a new ice rink. When I drove past it the other day, I thought it may be fun to go to some time with my roommates or FHE group. Ice skating, as an abstract idea, seems like very idyllic and wholesome wintry fun, like building snowmen in scarves and mittens.

However, I then remembered how horribly I ice skate. I have no balance, and have the coordination skills of a lanky 9 year old at best. I remembered an incident at our local Ice-O-Plex in California (always the best birthday location ever, by the way. Thanks mom!) I was in junior high, and remember feeling like my feet were strapped into tiny slippery death machines. I had to grip the wall desperately even though I was 14. On my third awkward solitary lap of the rink, a bratty little girl that couldn't have been more than seven was zipping by in a rhinestone encrusted ice dancer outfit. As she passed me, she said something over her shoulder along the lines of, "You're not so good at this, are you?" and then flew off at record speed in her stupid aqua green getup. It crushed my pride.

I don't think I'll be going to the Rexburg ice rink anytime soon.

The wind is blowing so hard in Rexburg right now.

2011-02-16T23:09:00.002-07:00

It is making a creepy constant whistling noise and I don't like it. And there's thunder. Weather.com informs me that it is blowing at up to 37 mph, which the Beaufort Wind Scale classifies as 'Moderate or near gale.' GALE FORCE WINDS, people. Our power went out for a half hour.

I feel like my entire apartment building is about to break free and take off a-la The Wizard of Oz.

Mark my words. When I graduate I am going to live somewhere warm and sunny and non-gale-force-wind-ish.

That is all.

"You transfix me, quite."

2011-02-13T00:25:00.002-07:00

Jane Eyre is one of my (many) very favorite books. Pretty much everything by the Bronte sisters is fantastic, but I especially like Jane Eyre because *SPOILER* 1) although the protagonist has a horrible childhood and faces huge dilemmas and sacrifices her temporary happiness in order to stick to her morals, she 2) gets a happy ending anyways. Awwwww....

So basically, I'm already obsessed with this movie and I haven't even seen it yet. I'm worried that I'm building it up in my head so much that it won't be able to live up to my expectations.

But I mean, can you blame me?

Loves:
- How creepy it is (it's a creepy book, if you think about it).
- Dame Judy Dench playing Ms. Fairfax (I mean, come on. If she's in it, it's got to be good.)
- I counted at least 3 direct quotes from the book in the trailer, which is a good indication that the filmmakers know their stuff.
- The depiction of her childhood. Poor Jane.
- OMG BERTHA! & the scary door behind the scary tapestry at 1:31. YIKES.
- I'm about to show my geekery in a very graphic way here. I love that the actress who plays Mrs. Reed (one of my least favorite characters in the book, besides Brocklehurst) also played one of my favorite Jane Austen characters in this version of Persuasion.

Worries:
- UH, its rated PG-13 for a' Nude image'?!?
- the visible age difference between Jane and Rochester (even though I know, technically, it is true to the book, it still slightly skeeves me out).
- Child Jane is bucktoothed. I have low tolerance for buckteeth.
- The trailer focuses a little too much on the eerie aspects of the story, and seems to downplay what the novel essentially is - a love story. It's a love story that happens to occur in the autobiography of an independent feminist, but still - it's a love story.

The real question is: Will it be able to live up to the amazing 2006 BBC adaptation miniseires? Only time will tell.

No I don't work here, but thank you anyways

2011-01-30T23:26:00.002-07:00

So, I was at Walmart this week looking over the cleaning products. (I seriously enjoy cleaning products.) A girl came up behind me, looking all lost and young and I-have-my-first-clean-check-tomorrow-ish, and asked me what I would use to clean my toilet and tub, and which isle those items could be found on. I wasn't wearing a blue polo shirt or a name tag, so I didn't look like a Walmart employee. I think that she asked me because either 1)I was there in the cleaning isle (most probable explanation) or 2) because I was exuding an exceptionally powerful Jedi-cleaning master aura (my preferred explanation). I gave her no fewer than 4 recommendations, and then directed her towards the Magic Erasers. I rock.

Sincerely,
Jedi Cleaning Master

Plans for this year

2011-01-18T23:26:00.003-07:00

2011 will be kind of awesome. Here's why:

I plan to...

1. Work on my time management, especially as it relates to bedtimes and sleeping. This may not seem like a very difficult thing for some people to accomplish, but those who know me know that I avoid bedtime like the plague. The plan: I am going to try to be in bed at or before 1:00am. Every day.

2. I am currently a (loose) dress size 14. I would love to get down to a loose size 12 by summer. Spending a summer in an actual bathing suit without a large cover-up on top of it would feel so good! I'd really like to reach my ultimate size - 10 - by winter, but I'll cross that bridge when I reach it.

3. I will pay off all my non-student loan debt. It is not that much, and it is quite do-able.

4. Read at least 10 books written over 100 years ago.

5. Blog at least once a week.

Unlike all of my past New Years Resolutions, I actually have game plans on how to accomplish all these things. Yay! Bring it on, year. I'm ready.

Goalie Wolies

2011-01-18T00:48:00.002-07:00

There is something about the word 'goals' that makes me cringe. It may have something to do with the fact that I label things I don't want to do at all - but know I should - as 'goals.' For example, going to the gym everyday this year would be a goal. (Tangent: I've typed the word goal so many times already that it looks more like goat than goal.) The goals I set for 2010 were these:

... Oh, wait. I didn't set any for 2010. Just now I was searching through my blog for my New Years post of 2010, and it doesn't exist. Apparently, I've had 2 years to work on my New Years resolutions from 2009. Lets see how I did:

1. Write in my journal semi-daily, and blog weekly.

I completely fell off the journaling wagon, but I've blogged at least 3 or 4 times a month. I'll give myself a C+ on that one.

2. Go down a dress size.

This one is tricky, because I have no idea what size I was when I wrote it. I've definitely lost a dress size, but it's because I also gained a dress size or two. Grade: B

3. Resist the urge to weigh myself every time I come within a 50 mile radius of a scale... and stop hanging my self esteem on the amount of force the earth's gravitational pull has on me.

Yeah... Resisting the urge to weigh myself is what got me in the 'gaining 2 dress sizes' situation. However, I have stopped equating my self-worth to how little I weigh. I want to be skinnier and more fit because it makes me feel happy and healthy. I'll give myself an A-, since I technically accomplished both parts of that goal.

4. Pay off all my credit card debt, or at least most of it.

Paid off most of it! And my car is payed off too. A-.

5. Be painfully honest, especially when something/someone is bugging me.

I made... tiny bits of progress on this one. I still feel guilty when I vocalize annoyances to anybody, but I have been more honest about those annoying things. C+.

6. Read 50 new books...and some of them will be classics

Fail. I read 17 new books, and only 2 of them were classics. D.

My New Years Resolutions GPA: 2.7, or a B-. Not too shabby, but not too awesome either.

Next up this week: post my new awesome plans for this year. Happy (late) New Year!

Quote Of The Day

2011-01-06T00:08:00.005-07:00

From my World Religions class:
"Please make sure you turn your cell phones off before you come to class, because they can be very distracting. Have you ever noticed that they always seem to go off when someone is bearing their testimony? I wonder why that is. Maybe... Satan is calling. Heh heh heh."
- Professor Chuckles (not his real name)

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

2010-12-26T17:02:00.004-07:00

Christmas 2010: It was a wonderful Christmas. It was also a very exhausting weekend.

Best of times:

-Christmas cheer
-family time
-home videos from days gone by
-presents
-jammies
-photos
-carols
-COOKIES!!!
-the true meaning of Christmas
-love.

Worst of times:

-dog eating a sock
-dog then barfing smelly barf for 3 days
-dog rushed to the doggie ER for life-saving emergency intestine surgery
-me bursting into tears after driving past the places I used to take her for walks (while we still believed that formerly mentioned dog may croak)
-me having a slightly hysterical emotional meltdown last night when I realized that I am moving in less than a week and am completely unprepared and unpacked and unready to leave the familiarity of home for the third time.

But... that is ok. Things are looking up. I really do still have 6 days to pack, and I don't have that much stuff. Also, lady-dog probably won't die!! So that is good too.

Goodbye, Grandpa

2010-12-13T01:13:00.003-07:00

This past weekend, I went to my Grandpa's funeral. It was difficult and emotional, but not exactly sad or anguished; it was a great and fitting tribute to his life. My Aunt Diane read favorite (mostly hilarious) memories of Grandpa that family members had sent to her during the week, and this one was mine. I think it fits his personality well.

My favorite memory of my Grandpa Tygerson happened about 10 years ago. We were visiting at my Uncle Rich and Aunt Laurie’s house with all of their kids. He and Grandma were sitting on a loveseat together, and Grandma was chatting with everyone while Grandpa looked bored. He started looking through Grandma’s purse, and fished out a tinfoil gum wrapper. He took it and put in his mouth so that it covered the front of his teeth. He turned and smiled with his tin-foiled teeth at Grandma. When she exclaimed, “Oh Don! What are you doing?” he replied, “I’ve got to entertain myself somehow, Lorraine.”

I will miss him and his awesome sense of humor, but I am so glad that he isn't hurting anymore, and that he is finally with my Grandma again.

the blair otter/witch project

2010-12-01T03:41:00.012-07:00

Ok so, I first discovered this video a few nights ago when I was surfing the internet and unable to sleep. It made me laugh so hard I was crying with glee. However, at the time I wasn't sure if it was really actually funny, or if it only entertained me because I was sleepy.

Watched it again... and it is still funny.

I did a little googling to make sure that the person being attacked was ok (he is).

AND.

You need to know that 1) the person filming and being 'attacked' is a 19 year old guy, and 2) he was chasing the otter around his yard before this segment of the video. I watched a longer version of it on youtube, and he was following the otter around his yard and trying to get it on video... so in my opinion, he kind of deserved to be run down like a ninny.

Direct quote: "eeehhooooooooeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa..."
What a champ. I want that yell as my ringtone.

quote of the day

2010-11-29T22:39:00.004-07:00

"This isn't open-mic night, dude!"

- Said by my co-worker, to our other greasy-haired hipster coworker who felt it was appropriate to not only bring his guitar to work, but to actually PLAY IT IN BETWEEN SURVEYS.
OH.MY.GOSH.

I'm Thankful For...

2010-11-25T09:44:00.005-07:00

My family.

My warm bed.

The opportunities I've been given, and especially the chance to get an education.

Parents who support me completely - personally, emotionally and physically (as well as financially during my first few years at college)

Sisters who are hilarious, loyal, and loving.

My jobs, and the opportunity to be employed at all during these hard times.

My stinky car Delilah.

Chocolate.

Friends, both old and new, that I'm able to stay close to even though I live out of state half the year.

My health.

The miracles of modern medicine that help to keep me healthy.

Never having to know what it feels like to go hungry out of want.

My weird dogs.

My membership in the church, and all of the temporal and spiritual blessings that come with that.

The beautiful things in life like music, great books, art, and nature.

My life. Just in general.

Happy Thanksgiving!

2 things I love.

2010-11-18T14:24:00.005-07:00

This article was recently put up on the LDS Newsroom site, and I love it. It expressed very clearly what I always struggle to convey to people who mistakenly believe that since Mormons don't support gay marriage or homosexuality, they must hate or seek to oppress gay people. The precise wording of the church on this topic will make it so much easier for me to explain our religious stances and the reasons behind them to people who are curious or misinformed.

In other (more magical) news, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows is premiering tonight. At midnight. I. AM. SO. THERE.

I really hope I don't cry. That would be embarrassing. PMS is not on my side though. I cried three times when I watched 'Eclipse' (also whilst PMS-ing), and it wasn't. even. sad. I kept needing to covertly wipe my eyes during the scene where Jacob walks into Bella's graduation party; I wanted to yell at the screen, "She just doesn't love you enough, Jacob, okay? Give up!"

If that movie and those characters reduced me to a sniveling pile of damp kleenex, then I don't stand a chance of maintaining any kind self respect tonight in the theater.

Especially during any scenes that feature a certain towel-wearing free house-elf.

I get emotionally touched very easily sometimes, ok?

25 years young and Nano Wrimo 2010

2010-11-07T23:50:00.014-07:00

I had an excellent birthday last week. I got up at 9:00am (on a Saturday!!!) and went to breakfast with my Meggie. My sister made me a beautiful cake. I got a snuggie and many other very fun things, and had fun just hanging out with my family.

That night, I went out to dinner with (most of) the fam-dam. The main conversational themes were: near death experiences (apparently, we are a dangerous bunch) and our weirdest/most memorable dreams. When we get together and start re-telling our favorite memories and stories, we just can't stop. We definitely took pictures, but I have no idea whose camera they are on. When I find them, I'll put them up.

ALSO!

I have probably mentioned this to quite a few of you (ok, probably all of you) already. November is National Novel Writing Month, and I am participating for the first time!

I have stalked NaNoWriMo for the past 2 years, just to get tips and tricks on writing, but never thought I'd participate. It is such a cool experiment in creativity. Also - it is ok if my little story totally sucks! Its about word count, baby.

At first when I decided I was going to participate, I swore I wouldn't tell anyone. I don't know why. I think I was embarrassed, and worried that people would think I had deluded myself into believing I was a 'real' author, so I was going to write a 'real' book and get it published. I'm definitely not. I'm using it as an exercise in creativity, but nothing beyond that.

Whenever I read authors say that 'they are their own worst critic,' I want to say, "Ho-hum. How humble and gracious of you. You can't possibly mean it that you are literally your own worst critic."

I totally get it now.

My characters are flat. My plotline? Weird and improbable. The dialogue is cringe-worthy. The worst, though, is when I'm especially impressed with how awesome a certain plot point or character development or narrating technique is and I scribble it down at work in between calls thinking to myself, 'Oh my gosh. I am so clever and imaginative.' Then when I get home and type it onto the computer screen, the stupidity of it reaches out and slaps me across the face and it takes all of my willpower not to erase it. That, however is the beauty of writing where quantity matters more than quality. I am temporarily banning my inner editor.

And who knows? Maybe some of the things I currently find laughable and shamefully dumb may turn out to be kind of clever, or at least interesting, when I go back through it all to edit. Knowing that kind of unlocks all of the ability to imagine and be creative, because I'm allow myself to ignore that annoying little voice in the back of my head that tells me my ideas are stupid. That voice kind of deserves to get shut up.

So...

I'm writing a novel.

This is Halloween.

2010-11-01T23:17:00.010-06:00

I had quite a fantastical Halloween this year. We stayed home, made yummy food, passed out candy to trick-or-treaters, painted pumpkins, watched 'The Nightmare Before Christmas' and tried to keep our dogs from engaging in mortal combat.

I believe this is the 5th or 6th time I've dressed up as a cat. Shameful.

The pumpkin cookies and cocoa puff spiders were delish; I wish I could say the same for my batch of warm butterbeer. It was YUCK. Here's a tip: When making this warm, frothy, magical beverage, be sure you boil the cream soda before you add butterscotch chips. Or else it turns brown and looks like basilisk vomit.

Dad was even into the spirit. He used this mask to terrify both trick-or-treaters and puppies alike.

Lady left her hat on for approximately half a second.

Don't be jealous of our multi-movie franchise pumpkins! (Bellatrix pumpkin; Queen of Hearts pumpkin; Joker pumpkin; Frankenstein pumpkin)

On to my birthday! I love that my birthday comes a week after Halloween. I get so excited for Halloween festivities, I forget that it is coming up, so it's like a nice little surprise. A birthday surprise.

I have no excuse.

2010-10-23T00:46:00.007-06:00

I know, I know. I haven't blogged in over a month. I have no excuses, actually. I have been writing, but none of it is really blog-able (more on that later). So, here is a little somethin' from the archives!

This was an assignment I did way back in 2008 during my second semester of college for a humanities course. We were assigned to read 'Why I Ride' by Jana Richman (which is a pretty good read, by the way). It is a short story chronicling the specific reasons the author has for her hobby of motorcycling across the country. We were supposed to write a present-tense creative non-fiction essay like Richman's explaining why we do the things that make us happy and relaxed.

It took me a while to think of what I would write about, because I don't really have any 'viable' hobbies like putting tiny ships in jars or building model airplanes. I like writing, but it seemed weird to write an essay explaining why I like writing. I finally realized that my favorite way to unwind is to listen to music, so I wrote my essay about that. It all just kind of came tumbling out at once. Beware: it is kind of long. I'm long-winded. Oh, also - I got an A+.

PS - The memories from my childhood are accurate as far as I can remember them. For example, I'm not positive that the actual number of Beach Boy vinyls we owned was 2 or 3; I just guessed.

(I've also included a handy-dandy playlist of the songs I mention, so you can rock out too.)

"Creative Non-fiction Short Story: The Drive"

After any particularly long day, I love to drive around with no destination in mind and blast my music at an unreasonable volume. It is the ultimate way for me to just be still – to experience and digest everything I’ve been too busy to think about that day. Today is a treat for me – I have a four hour drive from Idaho to Utah to visit my family for the weekend. I haven’t seen them in a month and I’m looking forward to the drive almost as much as I am looking forward to seeing them.

After I fill up on gas, I impatiently head down the winding residential streets and scowl at the 25 mile per hour speed limit signs. The streets turn into hilly boulevards, and then finally – the highway. I turn up the volume just enough to make my rear-view mirror vibrate. I start unwinding to the complex rhythms and beats of Muse’s ‘Apocalypse Please,’ and I whine along with the high, plaintive vocals. It’s such a beautiful, lonely song, and the desperation of it never fails to move me.

As far back as my memory reaches, I have had a deep connection with music. It has a profound effect on me, on my sense of well-being, and on my emotional state. I think it runs in my family. My dad was in a few rock bands in his young adulthood – some of his songs even got on local radio. He always had deep commitment to his music, something that led my mom to warn me and my sisters against ever dating guys in bands. “They can sometimes have mixed-up priorities,” she would say.

He still plays his old electric blue bass, sometimes. Now that I think about it, the way he looks while he plays – bobbing his head a little to the beat, squinting his eyes to read the music with a half smile on his face – is the visual representation of how I feel when I am cruising in my car with the stereo blasting. Marriage and adulthood have mellowed out his musical tastes; he mostly listens to jazz tunes now, and a little Eric Clapton. After a long day of shopping and errands, I’ve often come home to find him on the couch, nodding his head to blaring music - which he has wired, somehow, to practically every speaker on the first floor of our home. He calls it his ‘music appreciation time.’

My mother’s tastes in music have always been a little earthier. We had a record player in my childhood home in California, and some of my earliest memories are of dancing to the folk albums she would spin on it. I believe Peter, Paul & Mary, John Denver, and The Mamas & The Papas were a few of her favorites. I can still remember how easily those songs would make my occasionally scary childhood world feel softer. The Beach Boys were also in constant rotation on that old record player; we had two or three of their vinyl albums. Their tight harmonies and upbeat tempos were the backing track to most of my childhood.

It wasn’t until my adolescence that music became my most essential coping mechanism. After arriving home from junior high, I remember the sweet escape of grabbing my walkman, loading it with a homemade mix-tape, and sliding the soft headphones over my ears. I would close my eyes, and suddenly all of the awkward social interactions, all the pains of being misunderstood, and all of the terror of being thirteen would be put in perspective. Radiohead’s ‘Creep’ wouldn’t make those nasty things disappear; the comfort that song held for me was in the knowledge that someone else understood how I felt. Listening to it, I realized that I was not the only kid to ever have a horrible teenage life. The song’s sad, rhythmic chords brought peace to some of my most desolate days. It didn’t blast away the darkness of depression with cloying sweetness; instead, it made the darkness survivable.
---
I'm coming over a particularly high, steep mountain pass. It’s the only part of the journey – one I’ve made a dozen times – that makes me anxious. I try not to notice the huge trucks zooming past me. Nervously, I switch my iPod to the next song. It’s Muse, again. ‘Falling Away With You’ is one of my favorites by them, and the sweet acoustic track does the trick. I am calm again.

My relationship with music deepened when I got my driver’s license at sixteen. My father considerately, albeit nervously, let me drive his little two-door Saturn around town and to school. One night during my senior year of high school, I made plans to watch a movie with Ryan, a good friend of mine. I skipped to the car and drove to his house. As I pulled into his driveway, I could sense something wasn’t right. All the lights in the house were off, and a group of people were on the front lawn. As I got out of the car and asked what was going on, I noticed that some of them were crying. Ryan’s mom had died, they explained, and he was on his way to the hospital to say his last good-byes. His friends had stayed behind, not knowing what to do, how to help, or where to go. The closest experience I had ever had with death previously was when my great-grandmother, whom I had only met once, passed away when I was seven. I had cried, but I couldn’t really grasp the finality of death back then. At sixteen years old, I could.

I numbly walked back to the car, pulled out slowly, and drove. It was starting to rain. I didn’t have any destination in mind; I drove because I didn’t know what else to do. I switched on my windshield wipers, and Avril Lavigne’s ‘I’m with you’ came on over the radio. Even though I generally hated Avril Lavigne’s music on principle, I turned it up and it lulled me into a safe, comfortable cocoon. I drove, sobbed, and prayed out loud for Ryan and his family. That song made me brave enough to go home and tell my family the news, which I knew would cement the reality of it all.

One year later, I made my very first grown up purchase: my own car. In the year after his mom died, Ryan and I dated and formed a close relationship. It was almost exactly one year later that he was in the car accident that took his life. Driving my car was my only escape during the initial period of shock, grief, and endless condolences that followed his death. I had to get away from all of the well-wishers because when they tried to tell me that he was in a better place, I wanted to punch them in the face. They didn’t understand. Sometimes, I would listen to the songs that had been special to Ryan and I while cruising along the winding roads in the hills above town for hours, sobbing. Driving and listening to songs like Rufus Wainwright's 'Hallelujah' was one of the best remedies for my raw pain.
---
I’m crossing the Utah state border, and the goofy ‘Welcome to Utah!’ sign with the grinning, airborne skier makes me giggle, like always. I relax a little bit; only one more hour until I get to see my mom. This is her last round of chemotherapy and it will be the most difficult one yet, but it will also be a celebration of sorts. After this treatment, her hair will start to grow back and her strength will slowly return.

If my mom had her way, she would have kept her cancer a secret until her hair started falling out – and even then, she says, she may have tried to invent some wild, non-cancer excuse for it. She is stubborn(in a good way), loving and strong; she hates to worry me and my sisters. In September of last year, her doctors found a lump in her breast that was the size of a ping-pong ball. When the news came that it was cancer, I didn’t cry. I didn’t really feel anything. I think I temporarily 'checked out' emotionally - and somewhat mentally - when my mom’s life expectancy came into question. It wasn’t until a few days later, driving around Rexburg, that I really felt the weight of it, and felt the fear - My mom could die. I drove into the Rexburg temple parking lot around sunset, turned off my engine, and turned up Green Day’s aptly titled ‘Wake me up when September ends.’ I allowed myself to have a brief, full-blown conniption fit. I cried, I screamed, I stomped... and I listened. After three plays through, I slowed my breathing to the rhythm of its simple drum beat. I turned the volume higher. I think I listened to that song eight times in a row. When it was over I felt like I could face the world, and face reality head-on. I really don’t think I would have been able to do so without the privacy to fall apart, or without the aid of that powerful song about life and loss.
---
I’m finally home. I run up the steps, and my impatient dog barks out a greeting before I even open the door. My mother is sitting in the front room, surrounded by my sisters. She has a fashionable cream-colored cap covering her bald head. I hug her frail body; she is thinner than she was last time I made the journey home. Dropping dress sizes is one of the nicer side effects of chemotherapy. Her eyes are still a bright, serene blue. Looking into them dissolves all of the stress and worry I’ve been harboring, and I can finally relax. I’m home.

PMS.

2010-09-22T00:09:00.004-06:00

Today at work I sat next to this young man who kept. talking. to. me. Not in a friendly way, but in a loud, mumble-mumble-mumble way while staring at my face. At first I tried to smile and give sympathetic nods every so often, but after 3 hours I just stopped making any eye contact with him whatsoever. Because if I were to pay attention to his ramblings as much as he wanted me to, I would not have been able to listen to my headset and therefore not been able to do my job well.

So. About three hours into my shift, my mumbly co-worker started to draw a picture in his notebook with a pencil. No big deal, right?

Wrong. He is left handed, which meant that his drawing hand kept almost-touching my right hand. I couldn't move said hand because my mouse was on that side of my keyboard. After furiously erasing parts of his drawing, he would energetically brush the eraser shavings off his paper and ONTO. MY. ARM.

On a normal day, I'm pretty sure it wouldn't have bugged me that much. However, today was not a normal day. Today was one of those "my-OCD-flares-up-in-epic-and-hilarious-ways-when-I-have-PMS" days.

That is why when I saw him about to flick his eraser boogers into my personal computing space for the tenth time, I shot an involuntary laser-beam look of death at him. I hope it conveyed my (also spontaneous) mental warning to him, which was:

"If you do that one more time, I will definitely punch you in the neck."

No speaky?

2010-09-15T23:31:00.003-06:00

While I'm at work, the people I call for surveys sometimes pretend they don't speak English. How do I know they're pretending? This is how:

*Ring Ring*

Them: "Hello, this is the Robinson residence."

Me: "Hi, we are doing a survey today and we'd like to include your opinions in it. Is that okay?"

Them: "NO SPEAKY ENGLAIS!"

*Click*

When this happens, I totally want to fake them out and force them to take back their imaginary language barrier by saying something like,

"Oh no! That's too bad. We were rewarding our participants today with a $500 gift card. Well, see-ya."

It would be kind of like the old cliche technique of scaring a fake-paraplegic out of his unnecessary wheelchair by yelling "Fire!" ...but less 90's sitcom-ish.

We are.....PARAMORE!

2010-09-07T00:21:00.009-06:00

(This post is from the archives. I wrote it, but never got around to posing it! I know, I'm weird. The concert was this past May.)

Okay, so.

I had such an amazing time at the Paramore/Relient K concert! There is seriously nothing like going to see one of your favorite bands live, and to be right there while they're singing your favorite songs. I would be lying if I didn't admit that I got goosebumps on my arms approximately 3 times. I always used to laugh when my friend Meg (Hi Meg!)would tell me about how the Celine Dion concerts she went to were "seriously a religious, out-of-body experience," but I don't laugh now! I SO get it.

Anywho. They performed a much longer set than the last time I went to see them, because last time they were opening up for No Doubt. I like No Doubt, but I don't love them. This time, however, Paramore was the headlining band - and it made such a difference. The sound quality was better, the lights were better, our seats were better (we were closer, but we were also directly behind these ginormous speakers); pretty much everything was improved.

.... Well, except for the nasty couple in front of us who kept touching tongues and taking pictures of themselves doing so. (Sick.) I tried to photobomb them each time, but I was unsuccessful.

I was even tempted to go down to the mosh pit. However, I decided against it because 1)I am old, and 2)I don't like the smell of 17 year old hipsters.

Anyways, Hailey's vocals were superb; her range has really expanded on their new album. Next time one of my favorite bands comes to town, I am SO going.

I have to.
I am addicted.
And I will get even better seats.

PS: Here's a little video I made, complete with annotations:

Home again, home again, jiggity jig

2010-08-05T15:37:00.005-06:00

I am now officially living at home again! However, I am not officially organized yet. Not even close. That is ok, though, because I've been doing things like hanging out with my fam, watching shark week, boating, and getting sunburned. Annnnnd peeling. (bleh)

I am aware that my goal to blog weekly has been woefully neglected the past few months, and I am going to fix that. I promise! I actually have literally a dozen posts that I've written (just run-of-the-mill observations and thoughts), but never published. If I can't find anything worth blogging about during the week, I'll just edit and post those. In the mean time, please enjoy this gem of a news story. The news-part of this story is not humorous. It is serious. However, the eyewitness account that starts about halfway through? Hilarious.

Introducing: Antoine Dodson! I want to be his bff.

"He's claimin in your windows, he's snachin your people up!"

Dogs that are slow in the brain.

2010-07-06T16:56:00.003-06:00

I know that it doesn't really count as 'blogging' when all I do is post links to other blogs, but finals are coming up and I have little to no 'fun time.' Anyways, this one made me laugh so hard. The pictures are so spot-on accurate.I can't wait until I get to hang out with my borderline-below-average-intelligence dog, Ozzie, again. He has a new sidekick, Lady, who is unfortunately way, WAY smarter than he is. Luckily, he's too dumb to realize that.

Lady stealing Ozzie's bone.

Passive Agressive Laundry

2010-06-25T00:18:00.006-06:00

So, at my apartment complex there are very, VERY limited laundry facilities. Each building has one laundry room, and each laundry room has only 2 washers and 2 dryers. Here's the kicker: Each building has about 80 girls living in it. So I basically share a washer and dryer with 40 other girls. For this reason, our laundry rooms are in constant use, and if a washer has stopped, most people (like me) take the laundry out of the finished machine so that they can use it. Whenever I do this, I make sure that I put it nicely and neatly on top of the washer or in their basket, because it would suck if their stuff fell on the floor or something.

Anyways, I went in to do my laundry last night, and I noticed that the only washer that wasn't in use was full of clean bedding. I put it nicely on top of the machine, and started putting my clothes in. While I was doing that, my neighbor and Sunday school teacher came in and looked at the bedding I had placed on top of the washer. Since I know her, I cheerfully told her I was the one who had just barely taken them out and set them there, and I hoped that it was okay.

She just looked at me and said nothing. Awkward.

So, when I went in later on that night to put my stuff in the dryer, the only dryer that wasn't in use was full of - you guessed it - that girl's bedding. I put it neatly on top of the dryer, and started my load. (Note: Her bedding was dry.)

When I came back to get my laundry out, I found this note waiting for me on top of my dryer:

I promptly sent it to PassiveAgressiveNotes.com. Tee hee hee.

Since she angrily scribbled out "I don't know who..." I am pretty sure she knows it was me. And I think that Sunday school is going to be a little awkward for a while.

Oh, well. Ha ha ha.

Bad Romance Newsies

2010-06-10T01:45:00.007-06:00

Jackie and Georges wedding was beautiful, and went off without a hitch. Their reception looked like a giant real-life photo shoot for Martha Stewart Magazine. The food? Scrumptious. The house? Gorgeous. My joyful weeping didn't even smudge my mascara. I will post pictures when someone else uploads them, because I hardly ever take pictures on my own camera when I'm with the famdam.

Until then, you can enjoy....

NEWSIES DANCING TO LADY GAGA!
(aren't you so glad the internet exists? I am.)

Hammerhead Wedding Veil ALERT

2010-05-28T16:35:00.008-06:00

I had the most amazing dream last week. And by amazing, I mean it was so awkward and uncomfortable that it almost bordered on a nightmare, and I laughed with sweet relief when I woke up and realized it was just a dream. Some background first:

So, as many of you know, my sister Jackie is getting married this weekend to Georgey. He is awesome, and I am so happy for both of them that I know I am going to blubber like a sentimental boob at their wedding.

I hadn't seen Jackie's wedding dress yet, and I distinctly remember being excited about seeing it as I was falling asleep. In my dream, Jackie was trying on her dress for all of our family to see. I walked into that room that every bridal store has - you know, the one that has three giant mirrors so that the brides can see their dresses from every angle. I was relatively far away, and I was trying to figure out what the strange, white gauzy shape was at the far side of the room.

Then.

THEN.

Jackie turned around and I realized it was her. She had a giant, purple, rhinestone encrusted thing attached to the BACK of her head. Her veil was hanging off of it. She looked like a hammerhead shark. And her dress? It was like a pioneer dress, except it was made out of white satin and dark purple ribbon. Oh, and the skirt was one of those weird, see through, short-in-the-front and long-in-the-back monstrosities that you sometimes see on Miss Teen USA pageants.

The worst part? She loved it. In my dream, I mean. She LOVE loved it, and had already bought it, and since no one else had voiced any objections to it, I felt like I couldn't tell her how horribly ugly her ensemble was.

Thankfully, I then woke up.

Dear cute sister Jackie,
I am so excited for your big day. I am sure you will be radiantly beautiful. Just please promise me you will not to wear this:

... Because I will not be able to stop you.

Love,
Tami

Phase 2. SERIOUSLY.

2010-05-09T22:02:00.007-06:00

So, when I get my hair cut at the Paul Mitchell Hair Academy in Rexburg, I ALWAYS ask for a phase 2 hairdressers. They are hairdressers that have finished up the regular training for their licenses, and are just there to learn additional cool hair things. Anyways, I am sure I asked for a Phase 2 girl when I made my appointment on Saturday. POSITIVE.

However, once my hairdresser was ready, I noticed she was taking me to a weird part of the salon. It was crowded, and noisy, and the girls looked really young and OH MY GOSH IT WAS THE PHASE ONE SECTION OF THE SCHOOL. Instant panic attack.

I was faced with two choices: I could either run in the opposite direction and say, "I asked for a phase 2 girl, so BACK AWAY WITH THOSE SHEARS," or I could be polite, grin and bear it, and not ask for anything too complicated.

I should have gone with the former option. My hair looks like the 'Little Dutch Boy' that was featured on the front that brand's paint cans:
Exhibit 1:

Yep. Anyways, performing a Google image search of 'dutch boy paint' actually cheered me up a little bit, because the logo is QUITE creepy, in a hilarious way:

Exhibit 2:

Awesome.

Well, my llama died...

2010-05-05T13:00:00.003-06:00

Today before one of my classes began, I was chit-chatting with the people sitting around me. When someone asked if anything exciting had happened in the last few days, this quiet kid said slowly, "Well, my llama died."

I felt bad that no one laughed at his joke, so I giggled and said, "Oh, really?"

And he looked at me. Sadly. "Well, he was really old..."

[5 second silence]

Me: "Oh my gosh. You're serious?"

Him: sad nod. "Yea."

Me. "Oh! Uhhh...I'm sorry."

AWKWARDEST SILENCE IN THE HISTORY OF AWKWARD SILENCES.

That is all.

First week of classes

2010-04-23T17:33:00.008-06:00

Since BYU-I does its own thing (and by 'does its own thing,' I mean it has a weird, wonky semester schedule), I had my first week of Spring Semester classes this week. SO AMAZING! I did have to do some crazy class-changing hi-jinx though, because I thought I had signed up for Victorian-era BRITISH lit. When I walked into class, I realized it was Victorian-era AMERICAN lit. Boo. Anyways, I managed to switch it around so I really do have Victorian British Literature now. It is AMAZING. Our funny instructor read "The Lady Of Shallot" my first day there, and it wowed me. I had never heard the entire poem before. My only exposure to it had been through this scene from Anne Of Green Gables:

Anyways. It is gorgeous. Read it here.

My room mates this semester seem adorable, as well. I am super excited about them.

I am a little irritated about one thing, though. Every single semester, the BYU-I accounting office tells me that my student loan funds will be available the first day of classes. And every semester, they don't give it to me for at least a week. That may not seem like a long time, but when I start to turn to ramen noodles as a main source of nutrition, it FEELS like a long time. Its not even my money; it is the loan money my parents took out for me... but some days, I really would like to re-enact that scene from Merry Poppins when the little boy causes a run on the bank by shouting, "Gimme back my moneyyyyyyyyyy!!!" (Fast forward the video to 1:27, so you can skip the creepy old banker's singing/dancing bit)

That is all.

Bowling Brethren

2010-03-25T19:47:00.006-06:00

I was walking out of the new BYU-I bookstore today, which is right next to a miniature bowling alley. (I don't know why we have a miniature bowling alley in the student building. It only has like, 5 lanes.) Anyways. I turned the corner, and saw a bunch of religion professors bowling - in their dress clothes - with the bowling alley laser-lights on. They were high-fiving each other and everything. It was hilarious. I should have taken a picture. I though about it, but I would have had to explain myself if someone noticed me.

Feeling sad? Have some Eisley.

2010-03-24T00:52:00.007-06:00

I know I haven't blogged a real blog in forever, and its because I am living under a mountain of schoolwork and research papers. I just thought I'd share my remedy for too-much-homework-itis: Eisley. They are just so happy and quirky and dreamy and shiny.

Sigh.

Don't let the slightly creepy intro throw you. Just listen to it all the way through. Ideally, while imagining yourself in a field of wildflowers.

Oy. Eclipse Trailer.

2010-03-11T14:19:00.006-07:00

I am incredibly underwhelmed. It did not wow me. Maybe I'm just in a bad mood because of all my homework...but seriously. How did they manage to make Eclipse look boring? The music was pretty. That is about it,though. Boo. New Moon was such a good movie, and based on this trailer, I am worried that Eclipse will drop the ball.

PS - I know that a boring trailer doesn't mean it is going to be a boring movie. But still. I wish I could feel a little more excited about it.

EDIT: Okay, this video made me feel much better. It looks awesome:

Brandon.

2010-02-18T13:41:00.011-07:00

My cousin Brandon passed away a few weeks ago. I wanted to blog on how I feel about it, but grief is so personal that after I wrote it, I decided it was journal-territory. Instead, I decided to write down my favorite memory of him, like my sister Kristin did on her blog.

I was about seven, I believe, and I was at my Grandma & Grandpa Tygerson's house. It must have been Easter or Christmas, because my entire extended family from my mom's side was there. I have a large family; I believe my cousin-count at that point in time was 15. It was a really full, really noisy affair.

I was sitting on the big brown couch in their living room, taking refuge from the hooting and hollering of all the kids that were playing outdoors. My sister Nicole and I were flipping through the channels on my grandparent's TV. I loved watching TV at their house because they had cable - and at 7 years old, cable TV was the holiest of all holy grails. It meant that I could watch Nickelodeon, the Mickey Mouse Club, and an actual movie all in the same day.

However, my happy little moment was quickly interrupted by a large stampede of wild children. They all decided that they wanted to watch TV too, much to my despair. Everyone was clambering for the remote, standing in front of the TV, and just causing a general ruckus.

Brandon followed the crowd in, and shushed them. He was one of the oldest, so they all listened, which impressed me. He sat down next to Nicole, looked at her and said nicely, "What would you like to watch, Coley?" I remember that she just stared at him wide-eyed for a moment, because boys were a foreign alien species to me and my sisters when we were little. Any male relative besides our Dad kind of freaked us out, especially if they had facial hair or were named "Uncle Gary." (Sorry Gary. We like you now!) Brandon was the only older boy cousin that didn't make me run for the hills in terror because his friendly attitude put me at ease.

I thought it was so sweet that he sat there with us, ensured that it was quiet enough for us to hear what was on TV, and tried to decipher what on earth Nicole was saying she wanted to watch. It was especially nice of him, you see, because Nicole had a speech impediment that made her words sound like a jumble of little nasal duck quacks.(Sorry Nicole. It was cute, I promise!) We finally settled on one of the movies in the Batman Forever franchise. He watched the whole movie with us and continued to shush the other kids if they got noisy. That little event left a big impression on my seven year old self, and I remember thinking how positively cool he was.

We will miss you, Brandon.

Quotes from my first week of classes..

2010-01-07T18:36:00.010-07:00

(I meant to post this after my first week, but for some unknown reason just saved it as a draft instead. Sleep deprivation, perhaps? Yes.)

Advanced Writing and Critical Thinking:
(Professor): "...So, the final research paper will be 12 pages long."
(Flabbergasted kid behind me, under his breath): "Oh my GOSH!"

Fundamentals of Research & Presentation:
(southern professor that was very enthused about the new software): "How cool is that?"..."And how cool is thayat!?".... "I mean, how cool is thayat?"..."How SWEET is thayat?"
(The title of an article we were reading was called, "Books Gone Wild")
"... and then, the title of this article... well, uh... it is a reference that you should NOT recognize."
(Professor): "Make your thesis sharp - make it very edgy! Make you reader say, 'Whoa, put that thing away before you poke my eye out!' Seriously."

American Lit:
(Professor): "Looks like we won't be able to listen to Simon and Garfunkle's 'America' until next time. It will give you something to look forward to. And if Simon and Garfunkle don't make you enthusiastic about coming to class, then you should transfer out of here..... Heh, heh. Just kidding... Sort of."

Back to School, fool!

2010-01-07T13:53:00.007-07:00

I love back-to-school time. I get so nostalgic when I buy binders and homework planners and whiteout. Even though it's technically winter and the rest of the country isn't returning to school, it is still quite exciting for me.

My week has been awesome, although Thursday began as kind of a disaster. I was running late. (I am forever running late.) It was what I consider the early morning (before 10am) and when I am tired I move at a snail's pace while getting ready, no matter how much Diet Dr. Thunder I have consumed. I needed to leave for class in about five minutes when I spilled my liquid foundation all over my jeans, boots, and desk. I cursed loudly. After quickly changing and running to my car, it took me a solid 10 minutes to scrape it off because it was approximately negative 90 degrees (I exaggerate - a little) which made me 10 minutes late for class on the second day it was in session. Boo.

Other than that, I am having a blast. I am fighting very hard against the urge to channel my inner Hermione Granger and let my hand shoot up after every discussion question in my English classes, because of how enthused I am to be discussing poems and novels and short stories and actually getting credit for it.
I am in geeky bookish heaven. I only have two actual textbooks this semester; the rest are novels and poetry. If you know me at all, please try and picture how happy my face becomes while considering that topic. It probably would look something like....this.

(Disclaimer: I didn't make this creepy/hilarious picture; my very bored and occasionally very weird sister Nicole did. I also have no idea who that man is. He seems nice enough, though.)

My new apartment is so much nicer than my old one. I feel like I've moved up in the world... or at least moved up in Rexburg. Which is, you know...nothing like the world really. Anyways. My apartment has tons of storage space, a heater that works, a vacuum that works, a dishwasher (which makes my germaphobic heart of hearts rejoice) free monthly haircuts, tanning, exercise equipment and - the best one, wait for it - free mani/pedis.

Epic win.

I was going to take pictures of my cute new place and post them, but my room is too messy. I'll do that sometime this week, I promise.

PS: here is a gratuitous LOLcat.

:)

Dear elderly customer ...

2009-12-16T23:19:00.005-07:00

Your extravagantly bedazzled, feathered & sequined (I am not exaggerating) sweater would have made my day today all on its own, because it was that awesome. But, when you put your items on the counter to get rung up, and told me that you'd probably be returning them soon anyways because you were sure your 10-year-old grandson was not going to like them because he "is such a pain in the a--," you DEFINITELY made my day.

You rock.

I have a feeling these will never get old.

2009-12-13T17:05:00.003-07:00

Hip-hop elves are serious business.

Thanksgiving!

2009-11-27T12:55:00.003-07:00

We had a lovely Thanksgiving at the Booth house - and this year, it was even free of catastrophe (although Ozzie cut it pretty close by almost biting Grandpa Booth) and crying (Okay, okay, we haven't had a family cry fight for years, but the one year it happened on Thanksgiving was kind of hilarious). Yummy food, funny people, and one smelly dog.

I love my home.

I always feel super overwhelmed when I try to list all the things that I am grateful for, because there is so much, and my words always seem inadequate. So, I'll just go with my basics. I am so grateful for my education, my freedom, my parents and superfabulous sisters, their support and love, the miracles of modern medicine, and for all the opportunities that lay ahead for me.

I am also grateful that our Thanksgivings are nothing like
this.

New Moon Trailer Breakdown!

2009-11-18T23:47:00.002-07:00

So, I have kind of avoided writing or thinking excessively about how excited I am for the New Moon release, because I am afraid of repeating what happened with Twilight: I watched every single leaked clip and trailer on the internet approximately one million times each – and it kind of spoiled certain scenes in the movie for me. (Excellent example: the ballet studio scene. Vampires are fast, strong, and they like to crash through mirrors a lot. I GOT IT.)

However, I am a fan-girl first and foremost, so I know that I will like it. Done. However, I want to go in and actually experience as much of it as I can for the first time in the theater, so that I can LOVE it.

Now that the release is so close, (I am going to the midnight showing tomorrow!) I feel much more comfortable going nutzo with geekish hope.
I now give you: Tami’s New Moon Trailer Breakdown!

My First Impressions:
Oh snap! It pretty much liquefied my brain from its huge amounts of awesome. It looks like a real movie. Twilight had an indie/I-shot-this-in-my-backyard-with-a-camcorder kind of feel, and that was fine, but I wanted it to be a little grander in scale. This trailer had the least amount of items on my “Things I laughed at” list than any other from the franchise so far. Yay team!

Things I laughed at:
1) The weird way Bella annunciates her line at the 1:27 mark. “Oy have to gooe.”

Things I loved (and-possibly-made-me-tear-up-a-little-bit-don’t-judge-meeeee):
1) The pretty music.
2) The drowning scene – it is better than how I pictured it in the book. It is so stunningly sad - she is reaching out for death when Jake pulls her out. Quite the metaphor! And the way her hand turns ghosty-Edward into pretty mist? Sob.
3) Oh crap. Victoria is so stinking scary, being all silent and sneaky behind Police Chief Swan in the woods.
4) The werewolves look amazing. Precisely as they should – like enormous, horse-sized wolves. Not fluffy cartoon lassies.
5) Crazy old Bella. Always punchin’ werewolves in the face.
6) The Volturi. Being all ancient and eeeevil. Perfect.
7) Edward’s little foot stepping into the sun. WOW.
8) Dakota fanning as Jane: I could have done with a little less eyeliner. But she does creepy and sadistic surprisingly well. (Sidenote: I have been pronouncing ‘Volturi’ wrong since 2005... Embarrassing.)
9) The awesome attention to detail. Alice’s Porsche is the right color. It’s a minor thing, but it made me happy.

And just for fun, here are some werewolves. Cartoon Wolf McGillicutty is no more!

I Have Experienced The Laser Beam of Death

2009-11-04T15:36:00.002-07:00

Actually, it was just the laser beam of... dermatology. But it still hurt like the dickens.

So, I went into my dermatologist's office yesterday. I was feeling cool, calm, collected, even as they handed me the scary metal goggles that looked like something you would wear if you enjoyed tanning in a radioactive sunbed. Laser? Shmaser.

But. THEN. She started zapping my face, and it felt like a cross between being snapped with rubber bands and being poked with tiny, tiny needles. At the same time. I felt like a baby because I kept like, wincing and saying, "Oh!" (It was startling! Every single time!) When I told her that, though, she said that I actually did well - some people cry. So I felt a little less like a baby.

I don't know what the moral of this story is. I just wanted to whine.

In other news, I'm almost 24! Yeeeee hawwwww.

October 19th (aka I hate thinking of titles for my posts)

2009-10-19T15:19:00.002-06:00

Life is good.

I cried today. Not a lot, just a little. It felt good. I was remembering how six years ago, I made a phone call, and the info I got - that Ryan had died - changed me. It was a Sunday morning.

I remember hanging up the phone. The specifics I remember about that morning are so strange and disjointed. After I returned the phone to the cradle, I was struck by how contradictory it was for the sun to be shining brightly. It felt wrong that it was nice and warm, streaming through the window onto my crumpled face. Nothing should be allowed to be so beautiful and soothing when I felt like sinking straight through my bed and into the center of the earth.

Next, I remember being upstairs in my parents room. I told them. For some reason I felt the need to tell each of my sisters individually, as well. I remember sitting on the floor of some one's closet for a few minutes, for no reason.

The next really vivid memory was later in the day, right before dusk. I was sitting on the back porch swing, and was amazed that I could feel so much pain in every single way. Each breath felt like I was heaving a huge weight up and down on my chest. Even more bewildering was the knowlege that his family & his life-long friends must have been feeling much, much worse than I was. It didn't seem possible that any single body could hold that much hurt. That was the first time in my life that absolutely nothing made sense, and absolutely nothing could make me feel better. I could close my eyes, but he was still dead. I tried to lay down and sleep, but he was still gone. I couldn't find rest or peace in anything for those first days.

The last memory of that week was at his viewing. I walked by his casket, and I was gripped by the desire to touch his hand one last time but I couldn't, because I knew his body would be cold and that it would be just enough to push me over the edge. Since I didn't want to cause a scene by curling up in the fetal position on the mortuary floor, I walked past him and resisted with my hands grasped tightly together.

I hate sounding dramatic, but - it changed my life. And the most amazing part is that going through pain like that doesn't ruin you forever, like I thought it must; oddly, it makes every single happy moment richer. It stretched me, and now my capacity to love and live and experience joy is even bigger than before. Weird, right?

In other news, I love my job. The hours are perfect, its just challenging enough to be fun, but not overwhelming. The only (small, but occasionally entertaining) down side is having to walk past those shameless sales people who man those carts in the middle of the hallways and try to get your attention by any means possible. Oy.

Today I was walking by, and this dude with an accent and too much gel in his hair was holding a lotion sample out to me, smiling creepily.

Him: "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

Me: [Polite smile, with eye contact] "No, thank you."

Him: "But can I just ask you one little question?" [shoves the nasty little cup of lotion in front of my face. I can practically see the swine flu virus swimming around in it.]

Me: "No." [I now realize the eye contact was a big mistake. I avert my gaze and start to walk away.]

Him, shouting now, from a distance: "BUT I REALLY LIKE YOUR HAIR!"

[Did he seriously just say that? Yes. Yes he did. I laughed, but didn't turn around. Boo-yah.]

Pretzel bites are not worth dying for.

2009-09-02T19:16:00.005-06:00

Today, I almost had a near death experience.
I was walking through the food court at the mall on my way to work, and thought that I'd get some yummy pretzel bites from 'pretzel maker' to go with my obligatory dr. pepper. Caught up in the moment, I forgot how inconvenient it would be to hold my bites (which come in a cup) as well as my drink while I tried to get on the escalator. I stepped onto the moving stair with one foot - and for one very, very long moment, I lost my balance and my stomach did a flip-flop. I had no hands free to hold onto the handrail. My escalator-foot was moving farther and farther away from the foot that was planted firmly on the 2nd floor. I honestly thought I was either going to:

1)fall down the escalator,

2) spill my pretzel bites and my drink all over myself, or

3)both.

I pondered in that moment what an undignified death that would be. Taking a tumble down the escalator, landing right in front of my work's front door soaked in dr. pepper and covered in pretzel bites is NOT really how I'd like to go.

Even though pretzel bites ARE delicious.

I don't care that half my posts are about Twilight.

2009-08-17T17:21:00.004-06:00

Oh, snap.

Looks like they are sticking with Cartoon-Wolf McGillicutty, but I'll deal with it. Because it looks freaking awesome. Oh, also because - Jacob's kind of a hottie. Is that gross of me? He's 17.
Oh, well.

'Cause he's BAD.

2009-08-16T20:44:00.006-06:00

(This was said after our lovely dog, Ozzie, snuck upstairs and started eating starbursts from the bag...)

Mom: "We really should make a video of all of the bad things Ozzie does. We could play that Michael Jackson song in the background, and have him wear a little hat. Get it? 'Cause he's BAD."

I should be doing my paper...

2009-07-21T00:06:00.003-06:00

...NOT looking at the archives of SexyPeopleBlog. (PS thanks for the link, Kris.)

Anywho. Since I'm on the interwebs already, I thought I'd let it be known that, one day, when I have a boyfriend, I'd like him to never get me flowers. I'd prefer books instead.

My friend got books today from an admiring boy, and I thought that was WAY more romantic than receiving a bunch of bug-filled carnations from wal-mart, any day of the week.

That is all.

Crass, crass inspiration

2009-07-18T02:21:00.003-06:00

Hello fwends.
Finals week is here, so no real blogging. However, This post from one of my new most favorite bloggers ever made me laugh, and think, and remember. Please note - I would rate the language 'mature,' or 'cuss-tastic,' so you have been warned.

My favorite snippet:

"If they ask me to hold hands and say the serenity prayer, I will drive this crayola through my brain."

Arry Pottah!

2009-07-15T04:15:00.001-06:00

It was amazing. I just.... I just can't describe it.

Ok, actually, maybe I will try to, but later.

K Thanks!

Insight from my Children's Lit class

2009-07-14T16:47:00.005-06:00

"Generally when speaking with adolescents, if you state that Mary is pretty and Jane is smart, all they will hear is that Mary is stupid and Jane is ugly."

Ha haaaaa.

Dearest Co-Worker,

2009-07-05T15:14:00.003-06:00

You made me feel so smugly wise for bringing earplugs for my non-headsetted ear this week.

I am not sure why you thought it was appropriate to sing "Everybody wants to be a cat" from 'The Aristocats' at the top of your shaky singing voice over and OVER at work, especially when you work at a call center, where people generally like to understand what their customers are saying over the phone.

Anywho, good luck with your singing career.

Sincerely,
Tami

Dear 'Hostess 100-Calorie Packs'....

2009-07-03T11:10:00.003-06:00

You rock my world. I cannot believe you are only 100 delicious calories.

Sincerely,
Tami

Street-Wise Roller Skating Babies.

2009-07-02T16:04:00.001-06:00

I know I haven't posted a real blog in a long time. Homework has been crazy.

This isn't a real blog, but it will make you happy. The End.

Oh my asdlfkajsdlfahd;iasdfhdajfhalksdf (geek seizure)

2009-05-31T21:48:00.006-06:00

THE TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON trailer in HD

Things I laughed at...lovingly:
1) How the Jacob-werewolf is a CARTOON. I'm hoping that is just a rough draft of the CGI wolves.BLA.
2) Jasper's hair. I didn't think it could have gotten worse. It has.
3) Laurent's theatrical "I'm gonna suck youah blooood" hand gesture. Yea.

Things I LOVED-
1) How perfect the makeup and contacts are this time around.
2) How they somehow transported every visual detail directly from my imagination into the scenery. In Twilight, I kept getting distracted by how different everything looked than how I had imagined it; I think New Moon is going to blow my mind, detail-wise.
3) When he leaves her. SOBBBBB.
4) How freakin' scary Laurent looks!
5) The transformation!!
6) Cinematic value. It just looks so much cooler! Probably the result of a higher budget.

Excuse me while I go make a black, white, and red paper chain to help me count down the days till November.

Fun times at work...

2009-05-06T13:17:00.004-06:00

(this was during a phone survey, and we had to get the location of the caller.)

ME: "Okay, and what county do you live in?"

CALLER: "Um, its... uh... I...."

ME: "Is it H------------- County, or some other county?"

CALLER: "I ... Just... (whispering) I have no idea."

*hangs up*

I wish I could pass it off as a night terror...

2009-04-24T23:17:00.011-06:00

... because I have had those before.

night terror n.- A state of intense fear and agitation sometimes experienced, especially by children, on awakening from a stage of sleep not associated with dreaming but characterized by extremely vivid hallucinations

I had this one where there was a giant spider sitting on my chest, and it was staring at me. All I could do was stare back. If that doesn't sound scary, I guess you had to be there. I had another one after watching "The Bunny Lady" video on youtube. In that one, the leading lady was sitting in my desk chair, also looking at me. I dare you not to have a night terror as well after watching that. I guess my subconscious is trying to tell me that my greatest fear is being looked at. Or maybe I just really don't enjoy eye contact. Who knows.

Enough about my psyche. Switching gears!

I wish I could pass off what happened last night as a night terror because I feel like a total doofus for screaming bloody murder at two in the morning and running the possibly making my roommates fear for my life. What happened was this:

Something rustled in my room. And it wasn't a normal, 'room-rustling' sound. It for sure wasn't the pipes, the heater vent, or the sound of the wind. When I heard it, I immediately thought of the hyper-aggressive little squirrel-fiends that run around my apartment complex in the summertime. Those things are brazen little monsters, and have run into my apartment before, baring their nasty little teeth. They fear nothing.

So, since it was late and dark, I imagined that the sound I heard was exactly like what a squirrel would sound like, if it were rifling through my garbage can. Then, about ten seconds later, something lightweight landed on my leg. I screamed like a banshee, wildly flinging my leg up - trying to send whatever had landed on me airborne.

I switched on my bedside lamp, and noticed two things simultaneously: That the small garbage can next to my desk was full of oddly stacked papers which were slowly settling, explaining the rustling noise I had heard. The next thing I noticed was that a corner of my bedspread had somehow gotten yanked up while I was tossing and turning in the night, and had chosen, ten seconds previous, to settle back down - right on my leg.

I thought about checking to see if I had woken my roommates up, but they weren't making any noise. After checking with them this morning, I found out that my scream hadn't woken anyone up. Whew!

Also: If you clicked on the link to that bunny lady video, I apologize for ruining your life. Toodles.

Tidbits from home...

2009-04-21T22:24:00.005-06:00

I am super-behind on blogging. I know. But, I wanted to post a few memorable quotes from my visit home, before I forget them. Beguuuuuuzzz, I find my family quite hilarious and I don't want to forget these.

Kristin: "I wish everyone would stop acting like Miley Cyrus doesn't have a major speech impediment! Seriously, she does."

(This next conversation happened after watching Twilight with us - Go Dad!)

Daughter: "Dad, why are you so freaking hairy?"
Dad: "I belong to a native american tribe of werewolves...what are they called? Quileutes. I'm a Quileute."

Cuteness Explosion in 3..2..1.....

2009-04-02T17:18:00.003-06:00

I need a baby monkey....STAT.

Look at him sucking on his widdle thumb!!! Oh my GOSH.

I have procrastinated doing one of these ....

2009-03-20T16:52:00.005-06:00

...even though I believe I've been 'tagged' around eleven times in the past two months. I just didn't think I could actually come up with 25 interesting facts about myself. Then I realized that that is exactly what like, Eeyore would think. One of my non-serious goals in life is to be as little like Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh as possible. Eeyore bugs the crap out of me. I should get a bracelet that says WWEND. (What Would Eeyore Not Do)...

Aaaaanyways!

1. I bought my first car when I was 17. I still have her. I named her Delilah, because I love that name, but I think it would be rude to name one of my children Delilah because the namesake is kind of a nasty biblical ho. So, I settled for giving the name to my car. Anyways, I love her so much I kind of think of her as a non-living pet. Weird.

2. I am HATE bananas. Everything about them disgusts me. To illustrate how serious I am, here is a little story. One time when I was about 8, my kid sister Nicole was following me around the house, as kid sisters often do. (It may have been Michelle, but I am pretty sure it was Nicole.) I looked over my shoulder as we were exiting the kitchen, and I noticed that she had unknowingly stepped on an oozing black banana. (oh my gosh, my palms are seriously starting to sweat while typing this.) I screamed and started sprinting for dear life to my bedroom. She noticed that something was amiss, but probably thought that a stray rabid dog had wandered into the house or something from the way I was running. So, she ran too. She started gaining on me, and I was too manic at the time to explain that SHE and the nasty banana puke on her foot were what I was running from. I tried to slam my bedroom door to keep her from following me (don't judge me); but she pushed it open, still thinking that there was something chasing her, too. I jumped on my bed to get away from her, and she jumped on it too. By that time I was screaming, and my mom came in to investigate. She lovingly burst out laughing when I tried to explain what had happened. This entire story happened over the span of about 45 seconds.

3. I have not been on a date that I was actually asked out on in about three years. (I was going to write that I hadn't been asked on a date in three years, but then I remembered that this friendly drunk guy I met at a party asked me out via text a year ago. I politely declined.) Oddly enough, it doesn't really bother me.

4. Even though I will never get one, I am fascinated by tattoos. I think they are gorgeous, and I love how they have evolved over time into their own little genre of modern art.

5. I miss being a toddler daycare teacher practically every single day. I miss my babies!

6. I have to stop myself from starting a really good book if I have things to do. I literally can't put down a really gripping read unless it is to eat, potty, or sleep.

7. I have a chicken-pox scar on my right cheek. I used to hate it when I was younger, but now I think it gives me character. I don't cover it with makeup.

8. I have never been stung by a bee.

9. I never want to be stung by a bee.

10. I have changed my major about 4 times - but I think I have it just right this time. (English major with a creative writing emphasis; minoring in graphic art and possibly history....innnnnnnn case you were wondering)

11. There is something about the Bay Area (and especially Fremont and the Pacific Ocean) that makes me nostaligic- almost to the point of tears- whenever I go back. I love the smells, the weirdos, the palm trees and the traffic. It's still home for me.

12. I think LOLcats are hilarious. Seriously.

13. My body image right now is exponentially more positive than it was when I was 15, skinny and tan. I have grown to love my whole body- lumpiness, stretchmarks, cellulite and all - because it is mine. Weird! But awesome!

14. Moving from California to Utah at the age of 15 was one of the hardest things that I have done - but it also was one of the best changes of my life. There is nothing like starting over.

15. My parents made up my first name (Tamalyn). I love it. It makes it really easy to choose email addresses and screen names. My middle name is the same as my mom's (Kay), and it rhymes with the rest of my sisters' middle names. (In case you were wondering, those middle names are: Renee, Kay, May, Linnae, and Elaine. I know, Michelle's kind of doesn't rhyme, but my mom is a busy woman.)

16. One of my favorite things about my mom is how protective she is of us. Not in the weird, helicopter-mom way where she tries to swoop in and rescue us from our own mistakes, but in a momma-grizzly-bear way when she really needs to. Case in point: She is kind of scared of big mean dogs. Which is normal. This one time, when I was about 10, she was walking one of my sisters home (I really can't remember which sister it was, because the details are a little foggy) from Glenmoore Elementary School. I believe she also had the stroller with Baby-Michelle in it. A dog was walking down the street towards them, and as it came nearer, I think it growled at her. My mom tore an election sign that was staked into a neighbors lawn that she was passing, and beat the dog with it until it ran away. She is my hero.

17. One of my favorite things about my dad is how FREAKING LEVEL HEADED he is. I have never, ever heard him yell in anger at anyone, ever. Not even my dog. Also, he is really hard to scare. Case in point: You know those mean-but-hilarious websites that have a maze that you have to follow really carefully, but then out of nowhere a picture pops up of the girl from 'The Exorcist' and the speakers blare a really scary noise, basically making you poop your pants? We tricked my dad into doing it, and his reaction to the scare-attack was.... he blinked. Once.

The End! It was supposed to be 25 things, but I have homework.

I know I have been slacking...

2009-03-16T23:04:00.005-06:00

...And I am very disappointed in myself for not exactly 'blogging semi-weekly,' as promised in my New Years resolutions post. I'm not doing so hot on the other resolutions, either. My fat jeans? Yea, they're skin tight right now. Sad. I have been crazy busy with classwork, but my lack of bloggieness is mainly because I have developed this... blog-o-phobia, if you will, since I started my "Foundations Writing" course.

Since I’ve started really analyzing my writing and the things I read, I’ve been grasped by this paralyzing fear of writing something wrong (grammatically, syntax-wise, etc), which has resulted in me being afraid to write anything passionately for fear that it will be structurally lame. Which leads to very negative self-talk, such as "Oh my gosh, run on sentences, hanging clauses, BAD WRITING! I suck at life!! "

So, I’ve decided something: I’ll write as crappily and slangy as I feel like doing; however, when I go back and revise, I’ll use my newfound knowledge in the English language to edit wisely. Awesome! (high-fives-self)

In other news, I love my roomates. Looking over my last post about miss-crazy-from-greece has made me really value what good people they are - and they're great to live with, to boot! Like, we actually do our own dishes. We vacuum. We buy toilet paper. In other words, life is good. We plan on going to the No Doubt/Paramore concert in May (HOLLA!!!) and it would be an understatement to say I'm stoked about it. You'll get to meet my roomies then, too, family! (if you're in Utah at the time. Plan on it.)

Okay bye!

I love this website.

2009-03-14T19:04:00.010-06:00

SO. FUNNY.

I wish I had known about this site when I lived with my perma-angry foreign roommate. Sigh. I also wish that I had taken pictures of the notes she left so I could treasure her sweet little nothings forever.

Here's some of the notes that I remember - (of course, there were plenty more, but I can only record the ones that were funny enough to be memorable) I believe at least one of these was printed on my own personal heart shaped post-its. Oh,the irony!

DISCLAIMER: I am not making any of this up; the misspellings and the caps locks are authentic. These are correct as far as I can remember.

my knife is not in drawere. Plz BRING IT OUT!!! IT IS MINE

(she was convinced that whenever she misplaced one of her utensils, we were hiding it in our bedrooms)

This one was placed directly on the thermostat, in the dead of summer:

DO NOT turn off heater! it is FRZZNG!

I guess in her homeland of Greece, there was no air conditioner, so she didn't feel comfortable unless it was 95 degrees indoors. She could have remedied this problem at any time if she put on more clothes in the morning than silky lingerie tops and shortie shorts that showed her tush... but I digress.

Unfortunately, since the notes started happening after she had verbally forbidden us from speaking to her or her guests, instead of talking to her about it, we decided the best idea was to take the batteries out of the thermostat. Problem solved.

The next note puzzled me and Marie (my non-insane roommate), since by that time Kristina had forbidden us from speaking to her. I think it was in response to when I had asked her friend (who was living in Kristina's bedroom for about a month, using our TP, eating our food, and watching marie's TV rent-free) when exactly she planned on leaving.

If you have something say 2 my guests, DO NOT TELL THEM. SPK ONLY TO ME. THX

My favorite part was the 'thx' at the end. Oh, how I DON'T miss Ms. Crazy.

Technically, I don't think children should have access to webcams....

2009-02-27T14:17:00.004-07:00

And yet if they didn't this video's absence would leave a gaping hole in my life forever.

Highlights:

1) Full slow-motion spins.

2) Toy steering wheel.

3) How he looks like a cross between the kid on Jerry Maguire and Spence from "King of Queens."

4) The fact that you can SEE his listhp when he sings.

You're welcome.

Bad Day Gone Good

2009-01-27T13:02:00.011-07:00

So, I was feeling frustrated this morning (and by morning, I mean 11:45-ish) because I was running a little late for class. I was especially annoyed when I stepped outside, only to be greeted by my car completely encased in ice, with a light sprinkling of snow on top for good measure. Argh. So, I spent 15 minutes clomping around my poor little car-cicle, until my fingers were numb, my car mostly scraped, with a mere 5 minutes left until my class started.

When I pulled into the lot, I ran (okay, I guess it was more of a power-walk) into the building only to find my classroom deserted. Totally empty. I had been absent the previous class period, and apparently missed the memo that there was no class today. BOO.

I stomped back to my car, now conveniently and uselessly defrosted, drove to my apartment, and continued my frustrated stomping into my living room. I was inwardly grumbling when I put some leftover enchiladas into the microwave in an attempt to eat my crankies away. As I settled down on the couch to dig in, I saw this clip on "The Soup," and it honestly made my bad day turn good. I laughed so hard I cried, and I ALMOST had to spit out my half-chewed food. Bless Joel McHale's sarcastic and occasionally profane little heart.

Edit: Youtube wouldn't let me embed the clip from the soup, so here is some footage of the dog it featured:

And now for something totally original and not at all late...

2009-01-25T21:01:00.005-07:00

My New Years Resolutions.... (It's still January, OK? don't judge me)

1. Write in my journal semi-daily, and blog weekly.

2. Go down a dress size.

3. Resist the urge to weigh myself every time I come within a 50 mile radius of a scale... and stop hanging my self esteem on the amount of force the earth's gravitational pull has on me.

4. Pay off all my credit card debt, or at least most of it.

5. Be painfully honest, especially when something/someone is bugging me.

6. Read 50 new books...and some of them will be classics

Good old Murphy's Law....

2009-01-05T20:05:00.006-07:00

Murphy's Law: (noun) an adage in Western culture that broadly states, "if anything can go wrong, it will." It is also cited as: "If there's more than one possible outcome of a job or task, and one of those outcomes will result in disaster or an undesirable consequence, then somebody will do it that way"; "Anything that can go wrong, will," the similar "Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong," or, "Whatever can go wrong will go wrong, and at the worst possible time, in the worst possible way."

Warning: This blog is going to be full of my whiney-complaining.

I've decided that it's okay to hate Murphy's Law (since, being a 'cultural adage', it doesn't have feelings). I had to search long and hard for something to hate today, because all of the people and organizations involved in the explosion of bad luck that has settled on my lap in the past few days have been uncannily polite and kind - in a word, blameless.

So, I had to channel my frustration somewhere else- and I think that it's okay to rail and berate a proverb instead.

Tami's List Of Awesomely Epic Fail-age

1. Having my car towed from the parking lot next to the stadium (that one was my fault, actually - I didnt' know that it wasn't allowed to have your car there overnight!)

2. Not discovering that it had been towed until a week and a half after the fact, (since I was in Utah for Christmas) racking up $525 in storage fees - plus the initial $100 towing fee.

3. Since I wasn't able to pick it up until 3 days after I had gotten back into town, (the place was closed until today) I had to walk to Walmart on Saturday. I had food, but I was out of deoderant. Boo. Deo is something I refuse to go without. I can't handle being stinky. Anyways. It took about an hour, and on the way I slipped in the snow, fell on my knee, and tore a hole in my favorite jeans (the ones that magically make my tushy look small).

4. After picking up my car, turning it on in the parking lot to warm up, getting out to brush the snow off and shutting the door behind me (with my purse inside), I remembered that my doors sometimes lock themselves in the cold.

5. Yep, I was locked out of my car for 45 minutes. Outside. In the snow. Alone. No boots, no coat. In the creepy parking lot of Barney's Towing & Repair.

Okay, so that list was alot shorter than it felt like it should have been. On the brighter side....

Tami's List of Moderately Epic Win-age

1. On my way out of Walmart, my old roomie drove by and asked if I needed a ride home. WIN!

2. I was able to haggle down the towing and storage fee down from $625 to $300. Go me!

3. The towing place I picked my car up from had someone that they were able to call to jimmy the locks on my door. They were super nice, and almost apologetic that they even towed my car.

4. Mom was comforting, suppotive and calm when I told her how much it was going to cost. PS, my mom's the best.

5. I will never take my car & independence for granted again. I also discovered that I have a hard time asking for rides and help - something I need to work on.

6. School doesn't start till Wednesday, so I still have plenty of time to get books and such.

7. I was able to get home safely, and cheer myself up by looking at Failblog. EPIC WIN!

Here are some funny 'Fails' that put things in perspective for me....

"DOUBLE FAIL"

"CABLE FAIL"

"DANCE FAIL"

"SPEEDING TICKET FAIL"

my car got towed.

2009-01-03T02:15:00.001-07:00

And I'm too angry to blog about right now.

More on that front tomorrow.

Blog Humbug?

2008-12-16T00:04:00.007-07:00

So, I decided that I am not properly feeling the holly-jolly christmas spirit that I should be feeling this late in December. This is despite the fact that the adorable wreath I hot-glued sparkley ornaments onto (side note: my hot glue gun is in the running for being one of the best birthday presents I have ever received) is hanging proudly on my door, and I have decked out my christmas tree in jazzy, color-coordinated decorations. I am not feeling Christmas-y. At all.

I could chalk it up to being away from home for the very first time during the Christmas season, or blame it on the fact that Rexburg is all but deserted since the school break is on, or point the finger of blame on the dearth of Christmas carols on my Itunes. Whatever the cause, I am feeling very decidedly un-jolly for the first time ever this close to Christmas.

Let me explain something, though. It would be an understatement to say that my family and I are "very festive people." We enthusiastically decorate our home for every major holiday, and even color-coordinate our outfits for family pictures in proper holiday-related color schemes. So, like I said, we are very festive, and I LOVE it. I miss it.

As I was saying, I was feeling a little blue (which, by the way, is not even a Christmas color for goodness sakes) from the absence of my Christmas cheer. To remedy that, I thought that I could get in the spirit by re-reading "A Christmas Carol" by Charles Dickens.

Bad idea. Very bad idea. In my haste to find a cure for my Scroogey mood, I forgot how creep-tacular the beginning of that book is. I also forgot how much of a scaredy-cat I am. Anyone who has watched a scary movie with me knows what I'm talking about - except, when I'm reading something scary, I can't cover my eyes like I do during the movies. I just keep going.

Reading what is essentially a spooky old ghost story, was not a good idea to do all alone on a cold, white winter's night... which, by the way, is eerily similar to the setting in the book right before -you guessed it!- good old undead Marley shows up.

Awesome.

So, I think I'll save that particular re-read for next week, when I go back to Utah to be with the fam for Christmas. Until then, I'll download and blast some of Brenda Lee's Christmas album and drink lots of eggnog, and it will have to suffice.

All I have got to say is that Marley's ghost had better not star in my nightmares tonight. Fingers crossed.

PS: Thanks a heap, Charles Dickens.

(apology NOT accepted.)

So, I saw the Twilight movie.

2008-12-05T22:51:00.006-07:00

And I haven't blogged yet about how much I liked it! There were parts that I felt were over-cheezy, but then there were other parts and scenes that had seemed cheezy to me in the book, that the movie turned around and made totally awesome. For example - vampire baseball. In the book, I was like, "Big whoop. They run fast and bump into each other. Blablabla." However, in the movie, that scene is one of my favorites. It's so fun! Overall, I really feel that it captured the spirit of the book. There were literally times that I gasped - when we first get introduced to the Cullens in the cafeteria, or when Carlisle walks into the hospital room.

It just brought the best and most important parts of the book to life! Which is alot more than most book-to-movie adaptations can boast. I cannot wait for New Moon. Hopefully, the budget will be MUCH bigger the second time around, because my main qualms with Twilight were the uber cheap special-effects. (Note: If the werewolves end up looking like stuffed animals or Michael J. Fox in 'Teen Wolf', I will have a SERIOUS issue.) Overall, I liked it alot, and I may add to this mini-review when I see it again, because the details will be fresh. As a book-to-movie adaptation, I give it an A-, and as a movie as a whole, I give it a B+.

Also: This made me laugh. But I must warn you, it has eaqual parts hilarity & creepy-disturbingness. Not for the faint of heart, or the puppet-phobic. But still way funny!

LOLcatz 4 Lyfe, holmes.

2008-11-14T17:33:00.005-07:00

Because you don't need a reason to put LOLcatz on your blog. Enjoi!!1! (<--intentional misspelling)

Heck freaking YES!

2008-11-07T23:21:00.008-07:00

FACT: I love Paramore. They're so spunky.

FACT: Also, in case you didn't know, I'm uber stoked about the Twilight movie premiere.

FACT: I also have a weirdish affinity to music videos; I've always loved them. I don't know why, really. That being said....

FACT: This video is made of awesome.

TWILIGHT - Paramore Music Video

My feelings on Prop 8.

2008-11-05T21:06:00.005-07:00

So, Prop 8.

The California Legislation that defines marriage as between a man and a woman.

I would have voted for it, were I still a resident in California. Does this mean I hate/dislike gay people? Of course not. I have dear friends who are gay; I love them, and I worry that they may not count me among their friends after I post this. That worry, however should not (and will not) deter me from feeling the way I do, and expressing my feelings. SO...

If Prop 8 took away any one's rights, I would not vote for it. Period. It is a proposition that defines marriage as one man and one woman. Therefore, it is only reinforcing the standard definition of traditional marriage. This proposition isn't a revolutionary ruling. What I mean, is that there are already many restrictions on what is legally acceptable as a binding marriage. You cannot marry a minor. You cannot marry more than one living person at a time. You cannot marry your pet goat.

I support domestic partnerships - because they ensure that the rights (the rights that so many people think that Prop 8 would take away from homosexual individuals) are kept intact. Straight and Gay individuals will still have the right to get married, as they do now. They both currently have the right to marry one member of the opposite sex, who is of legal age. Everyone (gay or straight) has that right. If a individual is gay, they can still have all of the legal rights and privilege that same-sex couples do through domestic partnerships. Every one's rights are still intact; Prop 8 allows everyone, gay or straight, in California to exercise their right to vote and define marriage.

An example of a ruling that would take away the rights of gay people and gay couples would be a reversal of the current domestic partnership rulings. This would force a gay person to do something that is dishonest and insulting to them (marry a member of the opposite sex) in order to have the opportunity to gain the full legal benefits that married couples have. That would promote inequality, and be unconstitutional. I would not vote for a reversal on the domestic partnership rulings, because that would take away some one's right to live an honest life, and receive legal benefits equal to their straight counterparts.

Basically, I don't think that a committed romantic relationship between a man and a woman is the same as a committed romantic relationship between a gay couple or a lesbian couple. Prop 8 agrees with me. That doesn't mean that alternative couples shouldn't be allowed to be together, or that I don't think that they wouldn't know how to lovingly raise a child...

Which brings me to my last point. I think that no matter how dedicated, loving, and sincere they are, being raised by two dads or two moms is not the same as being raised by one mom and one dad.

It's different.

The repercussions of Prop 8, should it pass, would allow my children to be taught in school that same-sex couples and straight couples are different things. That part is tricky; some people would argue that "Love is Love." Yep, love is love. But legally binding marriage IS NOT THE SAME as domestic partnerships, though love is undoubtedly vital to both. Prop 8 doesn't change that.

I strongly feel that all children deserve to be raised in homes where there is a mom and a dad, and that nature & Deity have crafted both genders to compliment and supplement each other in the sacred task of raising children. I feel that raising children in a traditional family setting is ideal. Of course things like divorce, abuse, death or any other number of circumstances can intervene and prevent the ideal; but that doesn't mean it shouldn't be sought for.

Whew.

That's all :)

I kind of want to punch myself in the face.

2008-10-26T13:49:00.002-06:00

So. It seems that every sunday, all the forces of nature combine to make sure I don't go to church.

I know, I know, I need to stop blaming things outside of myself for my own mistakes. I'm full of excuses, but seriously! Today, for example. In pressing the snooze button, I am assuming I must have reset my clock to be an hour earlier than the actual time. When I woke up, and started getting ready, I noticed that the clock on my computer indicated that I was not going to even make it to RS, which is at the end of the block. I continued to get ready, in the vain hope that my computer was wrong (note to self - computer clocks are never wrong.) So, as I was ready to head out the door, my roomate walked in.

"I missed RS, didn't I?" I asked glumly.

"Yea, you did."

"I want to punch myself in the face."

That is all.

Quotes of the day.

2008-10-21T01:37:00.006-06:00

"If cancer were riding a bike, I would poke a stick through the tire spokes and laugh as it hit the ground. Even if cancer were a puppy, I would punch it the face."
-Kristin

(during my appointment a few weeks ago with my Doc)
Me:"I didn't expect to be okay. I didn't expect to be able to cope, but I am. I feel strong enough to actually be of use to my mom, and to help her and everyone else through this."
Dr. C: "There's something embedded deep in human nature, that allows us to rise to the occasion. You are healthy now, and that's why you are able to rise to the occasion!"
Me:"That's kind of awesome."